Still pretty??? Mileven ??

91)

Mikes POV
Richie's pissing me off now. First off, I was a sad egg and he hugged me to make me feel better, that was nice, but then he started being all dirty and shit and he's like 'oh your totally gay,' and 'oh you only fingered el? That's fucking pathetic,' just like, bitch, shut the fuck up. But what pissed me off the most was I didn't want him to stop? Cuddling me, I mean. I'm (mostly) sure I'm straight but, cuddling Richie made me feel... good? Nice? I don't know, I just didn't wanna let go. It was seriously shocking for me that I would even do this, because I'm usually dominant and not at all cuddly with el, but with Richie I'm acting like el does with me. It's really freaking me out. I'm pretty sure I dont like Richie, not like that. He has a bae that he loves, so do I. I don't know, maybe it's because he's older than me? He's easy to talk to? I can get super comfortable around him? He's really comfy to lay on? I'm not sure. I know what he was doing though. By teasing me and making dirty jokes all the time. He was trying to take my mind off el. And it actually worked for the longest time, probably because when I'm around Richie it's all just in the moment and I don't really think about anything else. But now he's gone and I'm left in the harsh coldness of the forest in the dark, I think to myself, what the fuck have I been doing? All this time I could've been looking for el, I was sat cuddling fucking Richie Tozier! Don't get me wrong, every time we fell silent I was searching in my head for her. I didn't find anything. I sighed, annoyed and ran my hands through my hair. I dragged my hands back down to my face. For some magical reason, my cheeks were wet. I felt my eyes again, confused and they were wet too. When did I start crying? I hastily wiped my eyes but it just wouldn't stop. I sniffed and hiccuped a little and wiped my eyes again. I looked up and Richie was standing over me with a sad and sympathetic look on his face. I looked up at him, tears still running down my face.
"Wh... why? I... I don't..?" I said.
"What's up?" He asked, sitting beside me, but not cuddling me again. Maybe he can read my mind.
"I can't."
"Can't wait?" I asked, confused.
"Read your mind."
"Woah, wh...wha? How did you..?"
"Guessed."
I nodded but narrowed my eyes, suspiciously.
"Now why are you crying?"
"I... I don't know? I miss el. So much and you did so well at keeping my mind off her, but every time we went quiet I was trying to reach her. I couldn't and the thought that I might have lost her... it just..." I said and unintentionally began crying again.
"Sh sh shh. It's okay... it's all ok." He said. I was now crying so hard that I fell silent, finding it hard to breathe. What if it wasnt? What if Richie was wrong and it wasnt all going to be fine? No, no I wouldnt let that happen. I will personally make sure that no harm comes to her. I took a deep breath and concentrated. Ignore the noise and focus wheeler. Come on. Focus. Concentrate.
"CURLY COUNTY! IM IN CURLY, MIKE COME HOME!" El screamed. "Can you hear me? Can you? Come save me! Please, they'll be back soon! Come back mike!" She said.
"El! El I'm here!" I yelled out loud and in my head.
"It's ok, shhh," Richie said, though he sounded distant.
"No! Shut it Richie I've found her! I've reached her? She says she's in curly!" I said.
"El! El I'm hear can you hear me?"
"Yes! I'm in the bluebell motel just on the boarder of curly! Come on, please! Come on!" And then her sweet voice faded.
"Richie!"
"What? Did you reach her?"
"Yes! Do you know if there's a bluebell motel in curly?"
"Mike, I'm pretty sure that doesn't exist," Richie said. I ignored him.
"That's where she is! That's where el is! Come on!" I yelled and we ran for a solid half an hour back to the house.
"We found her!" I yelled, bursting into the kitchen where everyone stood or sat, looking very sad.
"Guys? Guys I found her! I... I found her, I..." I trailed off when no one seemed any happier. In fact, they looked sadder.
"Mike, please don't." Lucas said, his voice broken, his cheeks tear stained. Now I really looked, will looked distraught, curled up in the corner on the floor, Dustin looked nearly as bad, his arm around him. This is the first time I've seen Steve cry, stood leant against the wall, or hopper, who sat at the kitchen. Max sat across the table from hopper, red cheeked and weeping into her hands, comforted by a sad looking tiff, nat and ruby. Jack sat on the side, next to the sink and his cheeks were soaked. Eddie was practically drowning in his own tears and looked distant, stood in a huddle of people including a red eyed- tear stained Beverly, a softly sobbing Ben, bill, Stan and mike.
"What... what's going on?" Richie asked, walking cautiously toward Eddie who threw his arms around the taller and cried, whispering in his ear.
"Oh my god... that can't be true... how..? Oh no," said Richie, tears springing to his eyes as he paled and turned to me, his hand over his mouth.
"What? What is it?! Can someone please explain what's going on?!" I yelled.
"She's... she's gone." Hopper said.
"What...? W-who? Who's gone?" I questioned, tears threatening my eyes at the thought of it being-
"El." Steve whispered. The tears came down.
"What? What, she's..? She can't be! I, I j-just talked to her! In my head, not an hour ago! She... she c-can't be gone... she can't!" I yelled, my voice cracking.
"She... she, uh, left this." Tiff said, handing me a note and sniffing, wiping her eyes. It read:
"To Hopper, the strongest, kindest and best man I ever met and the best dad anyone could wish for, To Steve, the bravest and most wonderful person I called a mom, To will, my amazing brother who was always there when I needed him most, To Dustin, one my best friends, and the only person who can really make me laugh even when I forget how, To Lucas, the most noble and kind person I've ever met, To Max, who always puts everyone before herself, to Beverly, who has always been there no matter the reason, To Ben, the friend I never knew I needed until we met, To Stan, the best person to talk to for late night conversations or if I just needed someone to talk to, To bill, the most selfless and kind person I've ever come across, To Richie, the most quick witted person ever and the boy with the biggest heart I've ever know to exist and the boy who, no matter what, always makes light of a situation no matter how dark it is, To Eddie, the boy who deserves the world but would still give it to someone else and the quirkiest boy I've ever known, To Tiffany, Ruby and Natalia, the newest but but some of the nicest and friends I have, To jack, the oldest and the most loyal friend I have and the first person I considered family, and to mike. My mike who no matter what always stood by my slide to protect me for anything and everything. The only person I know that no matter what life throws at them, they throw something back harder. To mike, the person who saved me countless times, the person who I know I could always have relied on, the person I would have loved to spend my whole life with and the person who deserves to be happy in this mad, mad world more than most. To all of you I'm sorry. I love you all with ever inch of my being and would have done anything for any of you, as you have done me. But, I can't apologise enough for what I've done. By the time you read this, I will be dead. Please don't look for me, I don't want you to go through the pain of you seeing me, but I have committed suicide. My mind got too much for me to handle and to be lost in it too often had plunged me into a depression. A depression so dark and deep I couldn't keep living with it. Just know I will be eternally sorry for what I put you through. I will always be with you all, forever and a million years after that. All my love,
El. xxx
P.S for mike:
Over up rain, road on optic money."
"I... I can't... I..." I said. I had to have imagined her. There is no bluebell motel, Richie told me, it doesn't exist. I can't process this. Eleven hopper, the love of my life is dead.

A\N YEAH, ABOUT THE 100th CHAPTER, I DONT THINK THERE CAN BE AN 100th CHAPTER IN A MILEVEN STORY IF ELEVEN IS DEAD.
IM SORRY, I JUST DIDNT THINK THIS STORYLINE WAS GOING ANYWHERE!
SO EL IS NOW DEAD.

... OR IS SHE?