Wanderlust

08/08/18

Time 18:48
(The amount of eights in that make me happy)

DISTANCE FUCKING SUCKS MAN.
Like I know you're sad and pissed off right now and all I want to do is hold you and tell you everything's okay and buy you food and make you feel alright but I can even do that.
I promise you I'm trying my best to get to you as soon as I can.
It's just harder because no one else understands how much it means to me that you feel okay.
And I can't explain how I feel about you to them because I don't even really get it.
Like most times I can look at you and forget everything because you're too perfect compared to anything else.
But there are still some times where I can look at you and feel nothing (very few times but I feel like you don't deserve that).
Maybe it's just my bipolar fucking with me as it usually does,
But still.
I guess a lot of other people would say that I like you,
And I think would too?
I'm really awkward I'm sorry.
But hey, you are too so what's the difference.
I would guess the only thing driving me away from being with you is my mums side of the family.
But I could just not tell them?
I don't know.
I'm rambling bc you're not here.
Saying that I have a gay cousin,
he gets a lot of stick for being with his boyfriend.
But they live together I think and they got through it so why can't I get it out of my head that I won't.
I need to stop rambling.
Also I see you staring at me on Skype a lot,
And I know you've caught me doing the same a few times but you're too shy to say anything.
Its cute.
<3