Insane - Who Are You To Judge? (Gripping Psychological Thriller)

Chapter 75 - Avery

I check the time as I get back to my front door – 6:37pm. I was out for a long time.

When I open the door, I'm greeted by an envelope as I cross the threshold.

I kick off my trainers, snatch up the envelope and rip it open whilst heading towards the kitchen.

Once I have poured myself a glass of water and downed three-quarters of it, I turn my attention to the letter.

I'm a little disappointed in you, Avery. I thought you would've caught on by now. Come on, think. Didn't you always get straight A's in school?

How do they know I got straight A's? They must have really done their research. Unless...

My hand jolts, releasing the glass from my fingers as the bang on the door vibrates through the walls. He's early.

I shake the shards of glass from my feet and tiptoe over to the hallway.

He smiles at me. "Hey." His voice makes my knees almost buckle beneath me.

"Hi. You made me jump – come see what you did to my kitchen floor."

As he walks into the house, he leans down to kiss me. "Oh I'm sorry. Did you spill something? I'll help you clean it up." And he goes straight into the kitchen.

By the time I enter the kitchen, he is crouched down with a dustpan and brush, sweeping the shards up. I watch Him, admiring Him.

Is it weird that I kind of love the fact he knows where I keep my dustpan?

As I watch Him, my smile fades and my stomach drops. After this evening, this is all going to change. I don't want to lose this. I can't lose Him.

"Right," he says as he hoists himself back up once the danger of cutting my toe has been eliminated. "Now that's done. Where were we...?" His voice trails off as he approaches me, wrapping his arms around my waist, lifting my feet off the ground and trailing kisses up my neck.

I shut my eyes and give in to Him. I just want to enjoy the moment. At least for a little while.

But my eyes quickly fly back open and I push Him off me, marching into the lounge.

"No, no, no," I murmur. "We can't do any of that. We have to talk."

Taking a seat on the couch, I gesture for Him to join me. He does so hesitantly.

"What's wrong? What do we need to talk about? Is it bad? Is it me? Do you not want to be with me?" I see the worry start to surge up as his imagination begins to wander.

I take his hands and reassure Him. "No, no, it's not you. You've done nothing, you're perfect, we're perfect. I just have to tell you something. Frankly, I think afterwards it might be you who doesn't want to be with me."

He frowns. "Avery, that could never happen."

I stare into his eyes. Oh I hope that's true.

I take in a deep breath. And then another. And then another. With every breath I mean to speak, but I just can't. My voice won't allow it. I know how this is going to go. I don't want to do it. I feel the salty water surge up my throat and it is too late for me to swallow the tears down – they have already started trickling down my cheek.

He wipes them away, pulls me into Him and kisses me gently. "Avery, please tell me." His voice is so soft, so comforting. "You know you can tell me anything. Don't be worried, it will be fine."

I believe him, I do, but I can't stop the tears from streaming. It's uncontrollable. It's like my body knows what's about to happen, even though my mind won't admit it yet.

He pulls me in closer and I wrap my arms around Him, pressing my cheek against his warm chest. I close my eyes, savouring the moment. Making it stay with me forever. Just in case.

"Avery, please." I hear the concern and the worry in his voice. "Tell me what's making you so upset. I'm here for you."

"You don't understand," I muffle into his now dampened shirt. "You don't understand how difficult this is."

"It shouldn't be difficult. You can tell me anything."

"You don't understand," I repeat beneath a flood of tears.

He lifts my head up and our eyes meet. "Avery. You can tell me anything. Absolutely anything. Okay?"

I stare back at Him for what feels like an eternity, oh how I wish I could stay lost in his eyes forever. But I can't. Forever has to end.

Wiping the tears from my face and bringing myself back upright, I close my eyes and take in three deep breaths.

"I kill people."