Lizard! Human! Alien! Monster!
Why do you ask?
Oh, you meant the gender. Sorry, I was hoping to hear a question I haven't heard twenty times today.
The nursery? No, we aren't finished. The noah's ark mural still needs drowning animals and dying people painted below the safety of the ark.
Not much longer now...they always do exactly what the doctor says, right? Your kids must be anomalies.
If course we aren't excited. I'm carrying around a parasite with the promise of less sleep and more stress to come. My husband dreads the appearance of a time and attention sucking little beasty.
Am I having [insert pregnancy-related malady]? No, but I've had a strange case of recurring symptoms of boredom, impatience, and long dry spells of living without intellectually stimulating conversations.
Ew. No, I really don't need to know that. It seems a bit personal, don't you think?
Pickles and icecream? NO!
Other cravings? Hmmmm....I am hungry....I'm always hungry. Really, just bring me food instead of asking more questions and I won't complain a bit!
You want to know how I'm feeling?
Like I haven't met my knuckle sandwich quota for the day. How are you? Wait, don't answer, I think I know.
Is it hard? Yes, yes it is. I've never had to work so hard on my life....it's not easy being this nice.
I'm sorry...really I am....I'm not usually like this...it must be the hormones...no, it wasn't you, really. I'm just overwhelmed, You know?
But that's just it. I'm not. I'm ready to start the best stinking career ever!
But that's a whole other chapter. 😂
YOU ARE READING
Who Did What Now?
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