My Second Love // a.i

Chapter 28

[Ashleigh's POV]
- May contain triggering material-
I walked into my house and sigh, mentally ready to fall asleep. Those bitches seriously took all of my energy, and I'm so done. I'm done with this whole letter, all the hate... I'm done with being judged. I walk down the hall and enter my room, kicking off my converse and throwing my shopping bags on my bed.
Today's purchase consists of: A flower crown, ball heels and the new Sleeping With Sirens CD.
Still on the topic of the ball, I haven't been asked yet. I'm hoping Ash will ask me soon, because it would be my last resort to ask him. Does he even know about it? I mean, it's in a week? God. I sit on my bed and fig my phone out of my back pocket of my black skinny jeans, and unlock it. The first thing I see on Insthram are comments, a good eighty percent of them are talking about that letter.
'@calums_jiggelypuff: Stay away from Ashton, you're just gonna hurt him you slut. Go slit your wrists and die.'
'@Theonewhoneverseesluke: Fuck off, Ashton doesn't need you.'
I have a million more of these comments, and I'm fucking going insane. The consistent fear of being dumped and that Ash will find someone new is enough, but being told everyday that I'm not good enough by his fans - who I want to accept me the most - is just heartbreaking. Can't they just see that this letter is fake? I did not cheat on him...
I let a lone tear make its way down my cheek, before making up my mind. I walk into my bathroom and get out the hidden matchbox from behind the shower, taking out the a razor I've hidden in there. I sit down on the closed toilet lid and cry, I let all my emotions go - sadness, exhaustion, humiliation, and just... Anger. I've been through so much crap from 5SOS's fans all because of this fucking letter that someone wrote. I take in a shaky breathe, blinking slowly and lifting up the razor to my wrist. I let out a breathe and press it to my skin, letting it run across and making a line of blood pool up. I continue crying and cutting, cutting and crying.
I'm so over life, I'm over being judged.

- Next morning -
[Ashton's P.O.V]
I woke the next morning to Harry running into my room, "ASHTON WAKE UP, YOURE EIGHTEEN TODAY!" He yells jumping onto my bed and screaming. I offer a weak smile and nod, "Thanks Har. What time is it?" I ask pulling him into a hug. He looks at his black watching, "Eight thirty." He replies and gets off of the bed. "Common, mums waiting!" He explains grabbing my large hand in his small one, dragging me down the stairs. I chuckle but follow, wiping the sleep from my eyes. I can't believe I'm eighteen today, I can drink...
"Awe, my baby is growing up! you're eighteen, you're a young man!" my mother cries as she wraps her arms around me in a hug, I hug her back as she snuffles into my shirt. I look behind her and there are stacks upon stacks of pancakes...
"What are all these f-" I start but get cut off by Calum, Luke, Michael, Ash and Anna running into the room with silly spray and attacking me with it. "Ahhhh, no! Common, guys!" I laugh as I get covered in silly spray. They all just grin at me, each giving me a hug, and I get a kiss from Ash. While I look at Ashleigh, I get a funny feeling, like down things wrong with her. Her eyes are a little red and she's standing like she's scared, her shoulders are hunched and her heads down. I take a step towards her and wrap my arms around her, "Are you okay?" I ask her. She nods and gives me a weak smile, "I'm fine. Don't worry about me, how are you Mr. Birthday Boy?" she asks standing on her tippy toes and kissing me lightly. I chuckle, "Common. What's wrong," I smirk. Ash dodges my gaze and bites her lip, obviously something's wrong. I take her hand and drag her into the lounge room. "Ash, what happened?" I worriedly ask. She licks her lips and shifts on her feet, finally speaking up. "I-I was shopping, and these g-girls came up and were saying that I'm not g-good enough for you and that I'm a slut... and they kept saying things a-about the letter a-and I-I...." She stutters mumbling the last part. "You what?" I question. Her bottom lip quivers as she lift up her left wrist, peeling away the bracelets that cover it. Underneath are lines, upon lines, upon lines imbedded into her skin. My eyes widen at the sigh and she starts to cry, tears making their way down her cheeks. "A-Ash..." I gasp grabbing her wrist. She cringes, "I'm sorry, I'm such a disappointment.... I should have just killed myself when I had the chance, I'm such a failure," She starts rambling but I cut her off straight away
"Don't you ever say that, you hear me? You are beautiful, you are amazing and you're just... perfect. If I hadn't had met you I don't know what I would be doing, not this. I care about you so much, and please... never do this again." I plead. Her eyes water again and she nods, pulling me into a right hug. I kiss the top of her head, my sweet, precious girl.

HI
THIS IS SHIT BUT I DONT CARE. MY HAND HURTS. I BRUISED MY KNUCKLE BOXING.
OH WELL.
THANKS FOR READING!!
- M x
VOTE | COMMENT | FOLLOW