The First Time

Hold On

Late that afternoon Jackie went into Jack's room. She finally got up the nerve to go in to see him. She wasn't sure if she wanted to see all the tubes and cords hooked up to Jack. Still, she felt like she has to see him, what if this is the last time she gets to say goodbye to him. Considering that a priest came earlier and administered his last rites. Yet she is still trying to have hope, that Jack will push through and be ok.

She pushes the large wooden door and slides through the opening. After closing the door she turns and see her boyfriend lying in the hospital bed.

Slowly she walks over to him, and as she got closer the handsome face she adored is now cut and bruised. The lips that used to caress hers now has a tube between them. Arms that used to hold her, the left one is now in a cast and the right has a bandage around the upper arm.

Jackie watches as Jack's chest rose and fell with the assistance of the breathing machine that they have him on. The doctor had said that tomorrow they are going to turn it off and let him breathe on his own.

She gently caressed the hairs on his chest, the very same chest she laid her head on the first night they made love; the same night she conceived the baby that is now growing inside her. A baby that she really may have to raise on her own if Jack doesn't live.

Even though she was hurt by what he said, she's not going to keep him away from their baby if he really wants to be there.

Not so sure if she wants to get back with him even though they aren't officially broken up. Hoping that they could at least be cordial with each other. Now she couldn't help but feel like all this is her fault.

"I'm so sorry Jack," she whispers, tears starting to run down her cheek, "if I had never gotten pregnant, then you wouldn't be here. I can't help but feel like this is all my fault. Please don't die, Jack, I wouldn't know what to do if I were to lose you," she chokes out before sobbing.

The only sounds that filled the room are her cries and the sounds of the machines.