Lies

Final words

Kokichi's POV:

The tears pooling out of my eyes refused to subside. I couldn't find the sound in me to bawl. I still held my beloved in my arms, and eventually I was able to identify the killing blow. The wound was a deep slice of the throat. I couldn't bare to look at the cut, so I took off my scarf, exposing my scars, and tided it around Saihara-Chan's neck. I brushed my fingers through Shuichi's black hair.

I was eventually able to pull myself together enough to talk. "Why. Why did you have to die. You were the only good thing in my life. I tho...thought that it was you and my...my organization were the good parts." My voice is overcome by sobs. "But it was all a lie. This god damn game is just a fucking lie. Dice isn't real. All I am is a fucking coward. Though even this game couldn't cover that up. In this game I'm a fucking coward who hides behind filthy lies. I know who the mastermind is. But she didn't do any of this. She just trapped us in this school. We are the ones who started to kill each other. She wasn't the one who moved the bodies. She isn't the one who did this to you, is she."

I take a deep breath. "I loved you with all my heart Shuichi. When you when you told me you loved me, that was the happiest moment of my life" I was smiling when I said that line. When I continued my smile faded into a frown of utter despair. "But that was also your biggest lie. You fell in love with the maniac in this game. The strong leader, who was an asshole that you leveled out with your kindness. The real me is a broken coward. You never fell for me and that's why I left you, I knew you would be better off with someone who could be the strong leader you needed, especially when you so obviously loved them. I was wrong. I'm so sorry, beloved."

I wish I could have said good bye to you. I wish I could of heard your gentle voice. I wish I could have seen your elegant eyes. I wish I could have kissed you just one more time. But I was scared, I didn't know what to do. And now, I will regret it for the rest of my life." These are the last words I would ever be able to say to my lover, while looking at his body.

"Goodbye, my beloved Shuichi Saihara, the love of my life."

I should update more often. That would be good.