Chapter 1

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"Where is she?!" I yelled running into the hospital. "Perrie!" I yelled out. Two doctors came up to me pushing me away from the emergency room. "I need to see her!" I cried out.

"Zayn stop!" The doctor said.

"I'm her fiancé I need to see her!"

"Let him go!" The other one yelled. The doctor that was holding me, let me go and I ran into the emergency room and I stopped when I saw her.

She was laying in the bed, pale with bruises all over her. I walked into the room slowly and when I got close, I grabbed a chair siting next to her holding her cold hand.

The monitor was slowly dying down, beat by beat. "Perrie. Please don't leave me. I love you so much. We were supposed to be together. You promised!" I sobbed onto her hand. The beeping stopped just as my world came crashing down. Her breathing stopped as well and I eyed the monitor hoping that it was all a misunderstanding. "Perrie." I called. "Perrie wake up." I mumbled as tears welled up in my eyes. "Please wake up." I said.

Doctors came rushing in dragging me out of the room as I yelled pushing them away calling for her name. "Perrie!" "No let me go!" I cried.

They pushed me out of the room locking the door. I slid down the wall sobbing. I let this happen. I could have saved her.

I shouldn't have let her go. I want her to come back.

"Zayn Malik." The doctor opened the door with sympathetic eyes.

At that moment I grabbed my keys and ran out of the hospital. I didn't need to hear it.

She was supposed to be with me. She's gone.

I'm gone.

_

"Zayn." Niall's voice beamed through the room as he pushed me back and forth on the bed causing me to fall.

I groaned and Niall chuckled. "Niall!" I yelled.

He flinched biting his lip running out of the room. "Liam!" Niall called heading downstairs.

I got up from the floor and sat myself on the bed running my hands through my hair.

Liam walked into my room with his stern father look and I rolled my eyes groaning.

"It's late. Get up." Liam shouted. "We have an interview."

I groaned getting up from my bed and headed into the shower. Groaning is what I seem to do lately. Hurting people is what I seem to do lately. Having nightmares about Perrie is not something I would do intentionally.

If I could control my dreams and my thoughts, I would take it all away right now. But sadly, when being a human with feelings, you have to stick with the good and bad memories of life.

And losing Perrie was one of them.

I stepped out of the shower, wrapping a towel around my waist and opened the door from my bathroom, heading into the closet taking out my clothes.

I haven't really been myself lately. I'm not the Zayn I used to be. I didn't care to dress properly. I didn't care about what I looked like.

I always wore baggy jeans that couldn't fit me and t-shirts with comments like, "cool kids don't dance," or, "Fuck you."

But seeming that I had an extra long night, I threw on my grey hoodie with my jeans and some messed up shoes.

No one was surprised at my attire when I walked downstairs. They all smiled softly, giving me the sympathetic faces that I didn't like.

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