Rejection's Chains

~*8*~ The role of a beta.....

First person for now on...
I looked back one last time holding my breathe as I made eye contact with him. He had left me the same way... on the ground in pain he didn't even look back once but I still couldn't help myself. The sight of his pained face for some reason hurt even though the mate connection was lost I couldn't help it, cause after a while even thought I didn't like it I started actually loving him. In some sick deluded way I did start having feelings.

I reached for the balcony door ripping it open suddenly feeling suffocated. I needed to get out of the ball room just the thought of their wondering eyes caused a wave of anxiety inside of me.

Somehow I managed to slip away. My mind kept replaying his pained face, was it the same for him when he rejected me?! No it couldn't have been.

I ran into my room slamming the door behind me. I didn't need anyone seeing me like this especially not after being declared as the packs beta. It felt like my heart was being squeezed constantly, I wanted to scream somehow get away from this endless feeling of suffocation. The thought of wanting this all to be just a bad dream trailed my mind.

My eyes focused on my bed, that's right if I laid down then maybe I would wake up from this horrible dream. In a state of almost insanity I made myself actually believe the whole day was a dream. However reality was always much harsher with me. I closed my eyes practically squeezed them shut yelling a cry for help in my heart.

I opened my eyes the next morning to the feeling of the scorching sun hitting me, melting the bits of mascara left on my face. In annoyance I rolled over hating the feeling of it. Lifting myself from the bed I crawled to the bathroom, for some reason my whole body lacked its usual energy it felt as though someone sucked the life out of me. I scowled as I saw my own reflection. Last nights makeup had plotted its revenge on me. My mascara was smudged and had made it halfway down. Yesterday's memories lingered in my mind his face still persistently replaying in my mind.

Why did he come back?! I thought he didn't want me...wasn't that the very reason he rejected me?! What now?! Now that I think about it if he was in my pack forest the first time we met... wouldn't that mean he knew my old Alpha?! What if he tells him my whereabouts?! He couldn't take me away right?! RIGHT?!

Still in thought I unzipped my dress tossing it to the side of my room I hated the sight of it. My eyes unknowingly focused on the time throwing me away from my thoughts. I was going to be late on my very first day as beta. I ran into the shower slipping on the water and coming to a hard landing leaving a bruise.

I found my usual gym clothes in my newly washed pile of clothing and dashed to the door, not knowing that opening it would be one of my biggest mistakes. I was complete and utterly surrounded by pack members.

Random people from different packs were there too probably people from last nights party. I really didn't have time for this.

"I'm really sorry everyone but I need to make my way to the alpha and I start my new beta duties please excuse me" and with that I sprinted through the crowd and swiftly made it in front of the alphas office. I took a deep breathe in trying to forget the happenings of last night I needed to be professional I couldn't allow my personal problems cause problems to the pack. Although it did enrage me that this fool didn't even think to alert me about the fact that this whole time he was scheming to make me the packs beta I mean come on you would think I would at least have the right to know that right?!

"Hi Andreo I'm sorry am I late?" I asked

"No not really, but let's put that to the side where were you yesterday we were looking for you!" He asked in anger.