I Can't Fight This Feeling - Jeffrey Dean Morgan Fanfic 18+

Chapter 6 - Best Friends.

Chapter 6 – Best Friends.

The Following Morning;

Ryan Vext...

With Tommy off touring for a little bit longer; I had decided to just crash here at my dad's house, in my old bedroom. I am not great at being alone over night; plus, I had, had a little bit to drink – well enough to halt me from driving home anyway.

Lying in my old bed – it's far too early to get up; glancing at the clock on my cell phone – it is only 05.30am. I hate being awake at this time in the morning – because once it hits 09.00am; I am so tired that I just can't function.

I knew that Tommy loved his job and he truly is a highly talented musician; but sometimes, I just wish that his job didn't have to take him away from home as much as it does at the moment. It's a good thing that I am not the insecure, or jealous, type – which, I have to admit it mostly down to my husband that I am not; there isn't a day that goes by where he doesn't send me little messages and tells me how beautiful I am and how much he loves me.

It may just be down to us being newly weds but I am certainly not complaining.

Everything in the house lay silent around me – Paige would sleep until about 11.00am, dad however, would be up around 07.00am.

I think that I may head over to Emily's early to see how she is. Emily usually rises early and I want to catch her in-case she decides to head out for the day. I know that Paige will understand and just come over when she was ready.

It had been such a long time since Emily, Paige and I hadn't talked at least once a day. It just felt weird not hearing from Emily for over a week now. It's not like we didn't understand why she hadn't been in touch. I can't even bare to think about losing my dad. I can't imagine what would happen when he did.

There certainly was no way I would be able to do it alone; I am so lucky that I have a sister, a sister who has always looked out for me – but when it comes to losing dad; that is when we have to look out for one another. I am also grateful that I have Tommy.

The hardest part for me is that Ben had been almost like a second father to both Paige and I, an uncle at the very least. If we weren't at home with our dad; we were at Ben's house. We spent all of the holidays together, we vacationed together and if we weren't spending the night at our house, we were all at Ben's house. We had been raised as if we were sisters – and we always stood by each other no matter what.

Seeing Emily at the funeral yesterday; I had been shocked at the way she had looked – I had never seen her out in public without her make-up on; yesterday she looked gaunt almost like she wasn't taking care of herself; it had looked to me that she hadn't been eating either. Both Paige and I had commented on how the clothes looked like they were hanging off her.

So, seeing her now, today, is a must. I needed to know that she was taking care of herself. Most of her younger life she had struggled with her weight, she had even been bullied for how big she had been. Even now that we are older – Emily still ate like a bird, she rarely finished a meal, she refused to eat junk food, I had seen her nibble on fruit between meals, but she was careful with what she put in her body. I knew that it was something that Ben had been concerned about.

Now was the time for Paige and I to ensure that she kept eating and if yesterday was anything to go by – then we needed to intervene now, before it got out of hand.

I am still finding it hard to believe that Ben is gone – we had all thought that the worst of it had passed. Having gone through the huge operation where they had removed his stomach – there had been a few weeks of worry – first Ben wasn't getting enough oxygen in his system, so they had, had to intubate him and sedate him – he had been kept that way for 2 weeks. Eventually, they took him off the support, with an oxygen mask; to keep his levels up, he was fine for about a week but then he started hallucinating; he was obviously on a lot of heavy duty pain relief, morphine being the one that caused him to become completely paranoid that there were people after him and convinced that there were armed police stationed all over the hospital, trying to keep him safe. For us watching, this paranoid man unravelling before our very eyes, was incredibly painful and if I am being honest, seeing him like that had completely freaked me out and I hadn't visited as much as I really should have. So, now I am going to make that up to my friend, by looking out for her.