My Nerd Project

Chapter 33: I Insist

When I woke up next, my eyes felt so sore. I didn't even know I went to sleep. I looked around me to see no one was there. I pressed the button I saw my mom press to call in the nurse. Leaning back, I went to tap my glasses to only grab air. I looked down, remembering I didn't have them anymore. I wanted to go walk around and clear my head. But I saw the wires were still attached to me, so I voted against it.

I thought it was good that no one was there, I could finally think things through.

I thought of what Blaine said when she mentioned how things could have been better if we weren't together. Then I thought of what Shelly said how Blaine wouldn't be hurt if I wasn't in the picture. How things would have went to normal. I looked at the monitor, finding it hard to do so since the wires were attached to me.

When dad was in that hospital room, all those years back, my only regret was not spending more time with him, even though we did hang out a lot. I have always had a better relationship with my parents than most people do. Maybe it's because I knew what it was like to lose someone close to you. I looked down at my clenched hand.

I'm not giving up on Blaine and me. It's easy to focus on just the negative, but we had more positives than anything. She was there for me for all those times when I felt like a loser, a loner, and a waste of space. I couldn't even confide in my own mom to tell her I was bullied, but talking to Blaine was nice. It made me happy even if the topic didn't make a lot of sense.

I tapped on my glasses again, forgetting they weren't there. My face fell again. My eyes started to water once more, but I shook my head. It feels like I've lost my father again, but I can't think like that. It hurts so much though. It's just so easy to lean back and stay depressed. I wiped my tears and said a prayer for my dad before looking at the machines.

I turned my attention to the window for a while. I heard the door open, but I didn't mind it. I wanted to give myself time to grab my composure.

"Hey Alan, feeling better?" I heard the nurse say. I didn't say anything. "The doctor will be here in a second, is there anything I could get you?" I gave her my attention now.

"Could I have some water please? My throat's been feeling dry," I told her with a frown. She beamed at me, glad I answered.

"Sure!" I gave her a half-smile, and she left me to the silence. The doctor did come by. I saw Mr. Evans, and it felt like it's been too long since I last seen him. Especially because I fell asleep crying in his daughter's arms. The embarrassment was crawling on me.

"Hey Alan." Blaine's father said coming in the room with a clip-board in his hand. I sat up properly in the hospital bed.

"Hey Mr. Evans," I said feeling embarrassed that my voice sounded weak. Thankfully the nurse came in with the water as promised. I drank it, feeling more refreshed than before. One less thing to worry about. I actually was able to keep a smile on now. I told the nurse thanks, and she smiled and left once more. This is when Mr. Evans addressed me again.

"How are you feeling? Feel free to be blunt." He said with a smile. I thought I should answer the questions speaking for the allergic reaction and not the whole emotional mess.

"I feel better," I say honestly. "I feel like I've been sleeping too much though. I was considering taking the wires off and taking a walk." I said with a sheepish smile.

"Well that's good that you didn't." He told me while he waved his clipboard. "I just have to run some tests, and if all looks well, we could be talk about your release. How does that sound?" I smiled at his words.

"That sounds wonderful." I said feeling relieved. He ran the usual tests, well not so usual but the usual for this time being. "I'm sorry to put you guys through trouble." I say, depression seeping at me.