Fear // Ashton Irwin

Chapter 9

*Fae's P.O.V.*

After I had said yes to Maia's invitation for me to come over to her house, I figured I just couldn't cancel at the last minute. I needed to go outside or something.

It had been so cozy just laying in my bed, watching some old movies with my duvet over my head, to just escape what conflicts I'd have to face outside. Yes, my mind was being very dramatic.

When I closed the front door, it was not my imagination that showed me the next conflict. No, that was simply reality.

On the other side of the road Ashton stood leaned up against his car. His arms was folded over his chest, and I could see he had already seen me on my front porch. I hadn't called him to drive me over to Maia, which could have other reasons beside the fact that I was ignoring him at the moment. I didn't want him to drive all the way to my face, only to basically drive back to his own house.

With a worried expression I approached him slowly, preparing to what he might say.

When I was right in front of him, I stopped but didn't look up at him. I honestly wished that I hadn't ignored him, because this only gave me more problems.

But he didn't say anything. So I decided to take the first step forward.

"Hi." I simply said.

His face didn't change, nor did his position. His eyes told me nothing, but at the same time they told me so many things and I knew he was hurt by my actions.

"Why didn't you just break up with me?" He asked coldly.

"What?" I said surprised.

"Was it because we were never dating. I see what you mean, we have only been on one date, but I seriously thought that we were actually in a relationship. I didn't I'd have to get on one knee and ask if 'you wanted to be my girlfriend'." He said looking away.

"Ashton, please don't..."

"Am I overreacting to this? Probably. But Fae, you told me at the party, where you saved that bird, that if I got tired of you, I would just say it to you. And after spending so much time with you this last month, and with us being together almost every minute of the day, I am not tired of you at all. It's more like the opposite. But now I think you're beginning to getting tired of me." He said, his last words coming out as a whisper. I was almost about to cry. I was so mad that I had caused him to feel like this, it wasn't anything near my intention, and he had totally misunderstood the situation.

I wanted to be with him - so badly. But I was really scared. I was thinking the same things when he tried to ask me out. Now they were just way more vivid.

"Ashton... I'm so sorry. I have been so weird these last days, and I have been having some stupid thoughts that I shouldn't even care about, but... I am scared." I said and took a step back from him.

"Is it because we have been moving too fast?" He asked. I nodded in reply.

"I have never been in a relationship, I don't know what to do! More importantly I don't know what to feel! I have never depended on a person as much as I'm beginning to do with you. I don't let people this close, and now I have, and I don't know what to do. I'm just confused that's all." I slurred out, the words falling out of my mouth.

There was a silence of processing.

"Does this mean you're not trying to break up with me?" He asked his eyes brightening up.

"No, I don't want to break up with you. I don't wanna be without you, but... Can't we just take it slow, and I don't know. Can't you just punch me if I ever start to have these thoughts again, because I don't wanna have them before." I laughed, Ashton joined in and my stomach couldn't help but flutter at his beautiful laugh.

"Alright, but I wouldn't punch you though." He said and pulled me into his arms. My head was resting on his chest, and I could slightly hear a faded heartbeat. I don't know what I had been thinking. I couldn't miss this for anything in the world.

"Come on, let's go to Maia's place. The others are probably already there." He spoke but before we even thought about getting into the car, Ashton leaned in and connected our lips. I had missed his lips so much, even though it was only a couple of days since he had kissed me.

The kiss started off lightly, but quickly turned into a sloppy kiss, and I quickly grabbed his neck to deepen it. He laid his big hands around my hips, and I could feel him pulling me closer.

I was the one that broke the kiss, mostly because I needed to breath. He smiled down at me, and I could hear his little giggle through his teeth.

We both got in the car and drove to Maia's house with him smiling all along. I couldn't help but smile either.

When we arrived it was Calum that opened the door. He greeted us with a beer, and I could already sense where this was going.

-

I was sitting on the end of Maia's bed, with Ashton sitting on the floor under me. I occasionally stroked his hair or flipped it over, when people weren't trying to communicate with me.

Ashton had a beer in his hand as well as the others, but I had politely thanked no when I got the offer. I didn't really like the taste of it, so I didn't see the point of drinking it.

"Why am I surrounded by losers?" Michael sighed. He was laying on his back in the middle of the floor.

"Thanks, dude. Means a lot." Calum said and raised his glass at Michael.

"No no, hear me out. You're not losers, I didn't mean that at all. Okay, maybe about Ashton, but you about him he's not really... Not really... I don't know he's just uncool." Ashton tiredly saluted Michael. "I am so glad I'm not stuck with him anymore. And it all started the day some girl asked me where geography was."

Oh, he was talking about me.

"I still think it was Fae-te that we met each other, so Ashton could fall in love with you." He said and I felt slightly uncomfortable with the change of subject.

Ashton leaned back and laid his head on my leg and smiled up at me. His pupils were bigger than normal and I could tell he was drunk too.

"And you two, I don't know what the hell is going on with you." He said and pointed at Calum and Maia who were placed on the couch that was placed the opposite of the bed. Maia was practically sitting on Calum's lap, and I could tell by the long looks they had given each other all night, that there was something going on.

"Oh, shut up, Michael" Calum said and I could see Maia roll her eyes. But Michael was still right. I had never seen them kiss or make out before, but I could definetly see the smile on both their faces, when they looked at each other.

Suddenly Ashton stood up, turned around and reached out for my hand. The other ones eyes followed us while Ashton dragged me out of the room. When we stood in the hallway, Ashton turned around again and looked at me.

"Why are we out here?" I laughed.

"It just became awkward. Maia is basically my ex, so it's a bit odd." He laughed too. I seemed to forget that Ashton and Maia had been in a relationship, but it was like we all forgot and just became one big group of friends.

He pulled me into a random room, and I was surprised to discover he was pulling me into a closet.

"What are we doing in here?" I asked as he opened the doors. He sat down at the bottom, his back against the side of the closet.

"I just wanted to see what it was like to be in a closet." He giggled.

I sat down on the other side and I needed to place my legs on top of his, due to the small amount of space in the closet.

"Well this is nice." He said.

_

*Author's note*

hope you like the chapter x

im gonna go play the kimmy k game now