𝗦𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝗛𝗶𝗹𝗹𝘀

(5)

waiting for you to speak to me meant nothing

it should have meant nothing

nothing more

the tenth night we met, we weren't both on time for our meeting. i happened to be late by maybe a minute or two. but how was i late to an unplanned meeting?

"Hey Nari!"

"Hey Sanha..."

sitting down on the bench next to him, yawning, and throwing my head back onto the crystal box that surrounded us, it seemed unreal.

"Are you okay?"

"Tired."

i sighed and looked at the boy that pouted his lips at the sound of my wore down voice. but even then, there was a shine to his eyes. maybe some type of hopeful glim.

"I had to set up flowers for a funeral last minute."

"Your flower shop does funerals?"

i nodded, my eyes feeling heavy right as my head went down. i felt a hand over my left ear, my head being pushed into the boy's shoulder. if i had been a little less tired, i would have reacted to the abnormality of a boy i met ten nights ago making me lean my head on his shoulder, but i was too tired.

"Yeah. I usually don't mind preparing for funerals. I think everyone deserves a beautiful ceremony but... we were called in so last minute."

sanha chuckled, a warm feeling spreading from his chest to the rest of his body, radiating onto me. it almost felt energetic, as if my battery was filled up by each word he spoke.

"I think that's brave of you, miss. Not everyone can be around the dead like that. You did your job in the end, right?"

as energizing as his words were, i was just too comfortable to even speak, only an agreeing hum leaving me.

"That's what matters then. I bet the ceremony was beautiful, everyone felt a little less sad because of your flowers, and in the end, your hard work payed off."

i chuckled at his positive tone, and i couldn't help poke fun at it.

"You're very optimistic."

"Isn't that how you should feel?"

my smile almost shrunk. yeah, that's how i should have felt. happy that i finished my job well done, yet i was complaining of how tired i was when someone lost someone dear to them.

someone lost their parent. someone lost their sibling. someone lost their friend. someone lost their coworker. someone lost the person they love. yet i was complaining of how tired i was.

sanha must have noticed my silence, it probably had created a tension in the air.

"It's okay to be tired, miss. It's okay to feel down sometimes. But always remember that you have it better than someone else in the world."

i remember the warm feeling in my stomach that teased my feelings that night as the bus arrived and i let myself look up at the boy.

he had a simple smile on his face. just a small, simple smile made all my tiredness flow away into the newly winter breeze.

"Yeah, you're right."