seconds went by slow, minutes even slower, but somehow hours went so fast, at least at this very moment as i realized that i knew sanha for ninety days.
another week had gone by and i hadn't seen sanha, hadn't even heard from him. he suddenly showed up during my shift, right now.
"Where have you been? You didn't answer my texts."
sanha quickly shook his head.
"I need you to come with me right now."
"Sanha, I'm working I—"
"Please baby I... I need to talk to you."
i looked over at my co worker.
"Hey, Myungjun, is it okay if I—"
"Go ahead."
as i quickly gathered all my things, i noticed how puffy his eyes were, how he tapped his foot, not impatiently, but nervously.
i followed him silently as we got in a bus, sat together, and went wherever he was taking me.
he took my hand and held onto it, very tightly, almost too tight. he kept humming to himself as he looked out the window. but i couldn't see anything but him. what happened? why did he need to talk so suddenly?
no, no, why are the negative feelings infecting me again? please...
my dear, what's wrong?
the bus stopped and i quickly followed him out into the street, going up, as i recognized, to the snow hills. i grabbed onto his hand the whole way up and when we finally stepped onto the very top of the snow hill, i turned to him and made him look at me.
"You've been crying... What happened?"
he shook his head, pointing up ahead at a small children's park.
"Let's talk there."
he sat down on a swing set, as i sat next to him, placing my stuff off to the side.
i waited for what seemed forever. his pink hair fell over his eyes, those doe eyes had turned dark and fallen, his lips were pursed, and his cute button nose was red, hopefully from the cold and not a sign of him crying a lot.
he looked up, looking around, suddenly, and somewhat worrying, smiling.
"My mom passed away when I was six. She was the only person I ever felt close to. It was hard for me to grow up without her because while my brothers favored my dad, I preferred mom. She always looked out for me and when she left... only the idea of her looking out for me from above made me feel somewhat safe."
he started softly moving the swing with one foot, almost as if he was trying to play with the snow as well.
"My brothers and I never got along as much as other brothers. I was away from home a lot, so they grew closer to themselves, leaving me like a third wheel. My dad tried his best to cheer me on with my dreams, he really did. But one day I guess he realized, there just wasn't enough... feeling to put in our relationship, so we only ever spent time together when necessary and in special occasions."
he grabbed onto my hand, still looking somewhere off into the distance, at the sunset that was yet to begin for another few minutes.
"I met Jinwoo at the hospital and we became friends. I felt close to someone but it still felt distant, almost like I couldn't bring myself to be closer to him. With Rocky hyung, it felt forced how we met and became friends so every time we hung out... it felt like we pitied each other."
he then turned to me and smiled, bringing his hand to tuck my hair out my ear.
"And then I met you, my love. You call it coincidence but I call it fate. The day we slipped and fell onto each other, I had been feeling so low... God forgive me for how low I felt. Yet you were there. You kept showing up over and over and over again. It was like you were sent just for me. My gloomy days became filled with sunshine and your very existence became like my medicine."
he stood up, i stood up as well as he took my hands, his smile bringing one onto my face.
"You became the one person I could... I could feel with. I felt like I could be myself and I didn't care how fast things were going because even as time was running out, it didn't feel like it. With you, time doesn't exist. You only exist. And what had been such low faith in life became a whole religion of itself as I fell in love with you. And you... Nari, you became my will to fight."
sanha took his hands to my face and pushed his lips against my forehead, kissing me as if every second counted. he then pressed his forehead against mine, hands still on my face, our noses grazing each other.
"What I'm trying to say is that... You truly feel like my soulmate. And I don't want to hurt you."
i slightly shook my head against his, smiling as i placed my hands on his chest. his heart's rhythm was slow and almost had no melody.
"You could never hurt me Sanha. All you give me is love and care. That's what I wish to give you as well."
i remember every kiss we ever had. but this one... this one felt the strongest. the most passionate. the most caring. the least painful.
because as he pressed his lips onto mine, we created a symphony, feelings singing through our lips, notes traveling down our bodies. a festival of it's own as we danced with each other at that very moment.
no seconds. no minutes. no hours.
just a moment of us, simply kissing, yet feeling every emotion the world let us have.
and as the fireworks faded off in the distance of our festival, our lips breathlessly separating, i wanted more music to fill my body.
"Sanha."
"Nari."
he looked at me, eyes shaking as he looked me up and down, eyes watering.
"I don't wanna leave your side. I-I wanna go home with you."
"Then come home with me."
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
