The Noise Inside My Head

whats wrong with me

sometimes I hate myself. I trust people too easily. and with that it will be too easy to be hurt and bullied.
and it is with my nature that sometimes makes me easy to play with and use by others.
Is having a sense of empathy for others wrong?
Is helping others wrong?
maybe because I have that feeling of empathy that finally makes me feel discarded if it's not needed.
 I didn't feel my tears rolling down my cheeks.
I don't know if I cry because I am happy, or do I cry because I can help people, or do I cry because I am used and then thrown away and abandoned?
feeling like trash hugging me tightly, I can't breathe, I feel depressed and hurt.
maybe it will only be a satisfaction for those who have done this to me. .

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       Selly Agtus