LOVING FIERCELY

8

Thanksgiving came along just like any other holiday. That time of year you want to spend with family and those you so do not want to see --that time of the year when you try to reconcile and amend with the ones you fell out with. At the far end of the eleven piece pembroke dining table was Kenedrick Kiensoky, his warm presence harmonized the room. The aureate light from the silver chandelier crystals ripped the room of any gloominess. The conversations were kindle as everyone tried to catch up.
"Its so sweet of you to join us again this year, dear". Marilyn who was Jon's aunt said. Her words were sincere, her smile geniune. She one out of the others who felt so heart broken about Jon's divorce and she didn't try to hide it.
I looked her in the eye, smiling sweetly.
"How is your mother doing?"
"She is still away on her trip..but she would be back next year."
"Whoa..sounds like she is having fun".
My gaze fell on Tanney, he was laughing at something Kenedrick was saying. The resemblance was quite striking for grandfather and grandchild, the only notable difference was Kenedrick's ivory complexion and Tan's light brown skin. A pleasant sensation filled my chest, I was glad he could get an abundance of devotion, a virtue alien to me. Even if something were to happen to me this very second, i would die, rest in peace assured he has alot of people to fall back to.

I excused myself to the restroom. Leaving the room, i left for the balcony. The night sky adorned itself with the beautiful full moon and bountiful stars. The breeze was warm and soothing, the red rock scenery before the dark heavens gave a jubliant zeal. I enjoyed the whole refreshing view of Sedona (Arizona) from here
"Its only 7:50 pm..look how dark it is already".
I placed my hand on my right shoulder massaging it, the grey wide leg jumpsuit became uncomfortable. I really wanted to take a warm shower, change into some old polo and shorts, jump right into the bed without any second thought. The trip felt long and late gathering already got me exhausted.

"Tired already?" a voice came. I turned around to find Jon. As always he looked impervious by the current situation. He long hair seemed to enjoy his recent haircut as it laid on his neck. His face held on to the profound smile -- his dimples enjoyed attention it got as his eyes twinkled.
He was simply...just simply good looking. I used to wonder to myself how he could master such duality obliviously, he could pull of the handsome guy nextdoor, the next second he is just one of those guy friends you want to expose your horrid world to --- then in micro seconds he is an adorable puppy, all in one he was always honest no matter the role play.
"Can you tell?" i asked.
"Are you kidding me....its written here", he waved his hands in a circular motion, demonstrating his words.
"I know..at least there is one thing i can't hide..stress".
He joined me on the balustrade.
"What a beauty".
"Yh..she is so beautiful tonight", i said referring to the blackish blue sky.
"Remember our first together here?" Jon asked.
I smiled wholeheartedly. There are some memories that mess with your emotions; this was that kind of memory.
"You were drunk..weren't you?"
"Yeah..i was..but my feeling were undaunted by the liquor."
"Wait..you actually remember?"
"i do..some moments are stuck with you for life."
His maturity bewildered me, and i didn't know why. He was just like me, unpredictable but in a sweeter format.
"Ain't you cold?" he asked. I could tell he wanted to say something but decided to hold his peace.
"Not really".
He pulled off his jacket, placing it around me. I felt a connection. When i was with Ashton, it was just a warm feeling that took me back to my youth. Those moments i didn't care what the world said, those moments that i still believed that i could find love and replace my creepy childhood memories. In Jon's case, i felt a connection, it wasn't a hormonal sexually concoction, It was a merging kind of feeling, like a soul-- i can't explain.
"Are you sure your alright?"
"Huh..yeah".
"Want something to drink?"
"What about the others?" i asked.
"They retired to their rooms".
"How long have i been here for?".
"I would be back".
He left me alone once again.  I snuggled the jacket around me, the scent wasn't that of a cologne. It had a fragrance of essential oil, a kind of citrus whiff to it.
He returned with a glass of water.
"It warm water".
I sipped a little.
"Thank you".
"My pleasure."
We were silent for a while until he yawned.
"You are just as tired as i am". my eyes softened at his sudden weakness.
"Can you tell?" he gave me a half smile.
"Stop teasing me".
Then we were silent again. I decided to let the cat loose and skip the small talk.
"You can ask me whatever". i said sincerely.
After our break up was finalised, he never spoke about it again. He never asked me why or the reason i wanted a deviorce. All he said was "Is that what you want..i would let you think about it..then let me know your final decision". He acted like a man in front of me that day.
He stared at me for awhile.
"lets talk inside".

I followed him up the spiral stairs stopping in front my room.
"C'mon..open the door".
I opened the door.
"Go in and take a shower..clear your mind..try to relax. Then we can talk."
I was dumbfounded.
"Are you serious?"
"Yes...i am". he said with a straight face. "There is nothing for me to say..i would wait for you until..you are ready to open up to me...even if it takes decades as far as i am alive and still have my hearing right..i would wait. So why rush?". He shrugged his shoulder when he ended the sentence.
I stood at the door like drenched cub. I tried to stop the tears in my eyes, they betrayed me escaping in front of Jon.
I sensed that he felt guilty.
"I didn't mean to make you cry....I am sorry." He hugged me, rocking me back and forth.
"You know...you look the sexiest when you cry", he teased.
I slapped him lightly on his back.
"There you go", he said breaking the hug. "Now you ain't sexy no more".
I laughed out loud before realising others were in bed, i bit my lips.
"Goodnight Fel", he kissed my forehead. Turning around he walked into the room opposite mine.

Attention readers
I want to make a decision based on your opinions. I changed the title of this book to "BREATHE". What do you think, which is better..the current title or the new one. Please i need your thought on this so please comment what you think. You are also free to come up with another title you think fits better.

Yea!!!!...now you tell me what do you think about their chemistry?
You think Tan has some similar personality?
Thank you for reading, sharing and commenting your thoughts. It really means alot to me.
:)
Cheers- N.Y POET