Zane: So I think I might be gay....
Gene:
Gene: We have been married for five fucking years Zane--
~~~~
*Zane is being boiled alive in Gene's soup*
Gene: *smacking Zane on the head with a broomstick*
Gene: Stop. Eating. All. The. Potatoes.
Zane: *uncontrollably eating the potatoes*
~~~~
Gene: Have you ever just wanted to fucking die?
Zane: All the time, fam. I can't wait until the day I've had enough of my tears drenching my bed, staying awake to four in the morning debating whether or not to end my fucking miserable life.
Zane: I can't wait until the day I put the rope around my neck and let the chair fall.
Zane: I can't wait until the day Lady Irene takes my hand and takes me away from this living nightmare--
Zane: Um... Gene? What are you doing?
Gene, on the phone: Hello yes Aphmau--
~~~~
Gene: That's it, you've crossed the line, young man!
Gene: Get on top of the fridge!
Zane, climbing onto the fridge: THIS RELATIONSHIP IS A FUCKING NIGHTMARE--
~~~~
Gene: *turns around in his seat* Say the line, Zane.
Zane: *deep inhale*
Zane: I shoved a whole bag of jellybeans up my ass--
~~~~
Zane: Hey Gene, come watch a movie with me!
Gene: What movie?
Zane: I don't remember what it's called, but it's a Hide & Seek game with this guy named "Freddy Cougar".
Gene: You mean Freddy Krueger?
Zane: Yeah, him.
Gene: *eyes snap open*
Zane, sitting with a bowl of popcorn: Oh, he found one!
Gene: *rams into the TV*
~~~~
Zane: So I need your help.
Gene:
Zane: It involves kissing me.
Gene: I'm listening.
~~~~
Zane: I don't know why I'm always so tired.
Gene: Because you stay up until 4am crying into your pillow as you decide whether or not to end your life.
Zane: You got me there--
~~~~
Gene: *lives a life of danger and risks*
Zane: *looking at Google Classroom*
*assignment is due at 12:00 PM, it is 11:59 AM*
Zane: I too like to live dangerously.
Garte, sipping coffee: Zane you have a F in that class, you better be turning your project in--
~~~~
Gene: Zane, this is our territory, get the fuck out.
Zane: You can't tell me what to do, you ain't my mother or my father!
