Unmasked - A Swasan Story

18 # Forbidden

In seas of flame, my plunging soul is drown'd,

While altars blaze and angels tremble round.

Love finds an altar for forbidden fires.

                                                                                Alexander Pope.

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Only Sanskaar knew what it took for him walk away from that 'heated moment'. The intense desire he felt to grab her into his arms scared him for a while. Broad daylight, in middle of his cabin which has very possibility of someone walking in or peeking in, his thoughts felt outrageous and it hit him them, he wouldn't have bothered at all, let consequences go to hell, He wouldn't have cared, which was not a good sign.

For someone who held control over his feelings and actions which he had been quite proud of, past few minutes proved otherwise and all because of 'her' - this elfin woman who managed to turn his world upside down in just one encounter and she does it every now and then. Two steps were all it would take and he exactly knows how she would melt in his hands ...

oh! How much he wanted to...

But he didn't. In a clash of wills and desire, he chose what seemed to be sane. He tore his gaze away with a herculean effort and silent walked towards the door. He heard an intake of breath, breaking the deafening silence in the cabin. He was not oblivious of the effect he had on her and she was equally relieved as he was.

She was! Definitely. She couldn't have looked away from those passion flaring eyes, holding her to ground spelling out a dark, deep desire. She couldn't have walked away when her every being screamed to be engulfed in those strong arms and one step from him, she would have crumbled willingly however insane it was. It hit her then .. she wanted to. She wanted him with an ache she never felt before. She waited with bated breath and watched him walk away in silence.

Disappointed or relieved, she had no clue but her breath found its way back.

He stopped for a minute at the door, turned towards her, his hand gripping the handle so hard turning his knuckles white and it opened smoothly after a minute. He was holding it for her, Swara realized. She took slow measured steps, her eyes refusing to leave him and just before stepping out, their gazes clashed at the entrance.

Sanskaar lost his breath.

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A keen observation would have made it clear: Sanskaar Maheshwari had not been his usual self for the next few hours. He felt restless and rigid with tension coiling up his insides, it screamed for release and he knew who could put him to rest - Swara.

What was it in her eyes? For the first time, she didn't avert her eyes and shy away, met him eye to eye. Has he been reading too much or they spelled the same burn and yearning? He had no answer but the ache didn't dull down a bit. It just seemed to aggravate with passing minute.No meetings, no amount of efforts helped him to quell this fire. Is it because he walked away at the verge of need or ...

Insane you are Sanskaar? What's wrong with you? He condemned the direction his thoughts were heading. And rest of the day proved to be a sheer unending torture. Sanskaar was thankful he had meetings all day long... she was out of his sight. A glimpse of her would undo him. When he walked back, the office was deserted, she was missing too.

He should have taken a breath of relief, He didn't. He didn't move, his eyes fixed on her place. When he walked into his cabin, he didn't like the silence and it no longer buzzed with life as it did in the morning. She was missing and gone for the day.