Finding Yourself Again

Chapter 3

  Ryan was already awake when Jon called the next morning. He had to call Ryan over Skype since Ryan could only use the building WiFi because he had no cell service any longer. Ryan was never good at waking up to the alarm, and he would have likely drained his phone battery to dead if he was depending on only that to wake him up.

  Really, Ryan didn't sleep much at all anyhow. His thoughts kept racing between topics: his impending homelessness, Alex's flat refusal to help him, and most of all, the way Brendon had washed his hands of him. He was angry with Brendon, but knew he had no right to be. He had straight up used Brendon; how would he have any justification to be angry that Brendon had decided not to take it any longer? As soon as it was clear to him that Alex was using him, Ryan kicked him to the curb as well. So even though he was mad, he also got where Brendon was coming from.

  Ryan beat Jon to the coffee shop by about 10 minutes. He relished the warmth of the restaurant, since the apartment had indeed gotten pretty chilly overnight. Trying to get ahead, and to keep warm by moving around, Ryan did his best the previous evening to start packing up some of his stuff, and deciding to leave some other things behind. Part of what he left behind was stuff of Brendon's that he had decided not to take along when he himself had moved. That part was kind of painful...realizing that those items were the only tangible things left of Brendon in his life.

  Jon slid into the booth with Ryan, and smiled at him. "Hey Ry! I see you got coffee. Did you order anything to eat?"

  Ryan looked down embarrassedly. "No...I only have like $20 to my name right now. Thought I'd wait and have some lunch while I'm packing and job hunting today."

  Jon frowned slightly. "Well, Ry, let me get you at least something small for breakfast so you have energy enough to take those things on today. I can also help you out - I don't have any photo sessions today." Jon had a really flexible schedule as a freelance and studio photographer.

  "Ok, Jon. Thank you for all of that. I do appreciate any help you're offering. On that note, what decision did you and Cassie come to last night?" Ryan was sweating bullets. He hoped he actually had somewhere to take the small amount of stuff he was going to keep.

  Jon was paused a few moments, and Ryan's nervousness grew. "Well...Cassie agreed to letting you stay temporarily. BUT...there are conditions."

  Ryan was quick to agree. "Whatever you guys want, Jon, I can live with it!"
 
  "Ryan, don't be so quick to agree to them before you know what they are. Just listen first and see if you can live with it." Jon was skeptical that Ryan would be ok with all the conditions. The boys paused their conversation to give the waitress their order when she returned.

  After she left, Ryan said, "Ok, Jon, lay it on me. I'm sure whatever it is, it's completely reasonable."

  Jon took a deep breath. "Well, first of all, no guys brought back to our place. That's not a gay thing, you know that. It's a 'Cass-is-super-protective-of-Bren' thing and she's gonna be pissed seeing you with any other guy in the near future."

  Ryan said, "Ok, that's cool by me. I've had enough relationship drama to last me a long while."

  Jon smirked. "That brings me to my next point. We want you to agree not to see Alex Greenwald anymore, at all. He's not good for you, and his arrival on the scene is what blew everything apart."

  Ryan snorted. "You don't have to worry about that. I don't care if I never see that prick ever again. I told him to fuck off in not so many words on the phone yesterday."

  "Well, thank God", Jon said. "That makes that one easy. It's the next one I think you'll actually have a problem with....we want you to go to rehab."