S.E.A.L IV: All I Need

Chapter 5

-Nia-

When you blacked out, you grabbed the knife and attacked him? I didn't initially black out, I remember being upset because he said something foul to me. What did he say?

"Maybe if you didn't act like a damn child all the damn time I wouldn't treat you like one."

And why would he say that you were acting like a child? We constantly argue about the finances and household responsibilities. He handles the household bills as far as paying the mortgage and stuff, cause he thinks I am not responsible enough to do it. But he leaves me to handle the shit like grocery shopping, cooking, laundry, and I'll be damned if this nig... I mean this man didn't make me take out the trash. Wait he made you take out the trash? Yeah to his defense though I did throw up in it. I won't ask why the doctor said smirking. I would think that a person like him would relish having a wife that wants to handle the household business. You would think. At one point I was handling it all, but I forgot to make one payment and he flew off the deep end. After that he would chastise me about every little thing I did. To be honest with you, that night I was fed up because once again he came home late. Did you explain to him why you were fed up? I tried but he was so nonchalant like he didn't leave me at home with a sick child, a dirty house, and not only that I had work to do for my second job. When I saw the lipstick on his shirt, that's when something clicked.

This was my second meeting with the counselor that Li recommended to me. The first meeting was pointless because I didn't even open-up to her and I didn't think I needed the help. I figured I was strong enough to deal with it on my own. That couldn't be farther from the truth. I did need the help and became more evident after the incident with Danielle trying to set me up. I kept thinking how I was about to walk into some shit and he wasn't even the least bit concerned for my well being or that of his children.

Ahh so that was the issue. Huh! Him not being home enough? I sniffed a little thinking about it, I've always supported Charli and his dreams, I just thought when I started living mine he'd be more supportive of me. Have you told Charli that he needs to be home more Nia? I thought he'd get it when we argued but apparently that just gave him more leeway to go and do whatever he wants. You two have to communicate he can't read your mind just like you can't read his. He may think that it's cool to be gone all the time because you don't tell him otherwise. I didn't think I had to tell him, I mean we've been together for so long I just assumed he knew. Therein lies your issue Nia you can't assume anything especially when it comes to men, you have to be clear and direct with them for them to understand what you are saying and feeling. I nodded listening to her.

I think it would be beneficial if Charli came in with you to these sessions. Why does he need to come can't I just fix these issues myself? You really think you can fix them without your husband? Yes, the less he knows the better. She took in a deep breath while staring at me, you've been married for how long? 5 years! And how long yall been together? A little over 10 years. 10 years with the same person Nia, think about that, you two have passed the 7-year itch and not to say that marriage gets easier because I can tell you it doesn't, but you have to communicate, and you have to work for your marriage. Do you want your marriage? Yeah, I do. Good then you'll communicate and tell Charli when you aren't happy. I understand I said nodding. Good if you put in the work you'll see the benefits Nia. Thanks, I understand why Li recommended you. I've been their counselor for a long time, trust me if you want their longevity you gotta put in the work. They all see you? Now Nia you know I can't tell you that. I don't mean... I know what you mean, and like I said, put in the work and you'll see the efforts. You see that the 4 of them are together now. Yeah but they still have their issues. What couple or in their case unit doesn't. They communicate, and they also understand their relationship. I get it I said smiling I'll see you next time. Yeah you will I said grabbing my purse to go. Nia, bring him that's the only way you are going to fix this. I got it Doc I said before leaving.