The King

chapter 45

Lucas and I stepped out of the castle, dressed in all black. A heavy amount of snow had accumulated all over the front steps of the house, but what else was to be expected, it was December. To be exact it was December 25th, Christmas day. Zeke was still in the hospital, and so was Penny. Mandy had tried to stay with Penny, but her heart broken mate only sought the company of her brother.

So far Lucas and I had spent our time after the attack preparing the funerals, amidst all of this we both had to give individual speeches to reassure the anxious pack members of our current situation.

Today was Giuseppe's funeral, and after attending all the other three funerals I wasn't sure if my heart could take another, especially his, especially on Christmas.

Lucas opened the car door for me, I sat in quickly to get out of the cold. Our relationship- whatever it was at all- was so heavily strained, we both had nothing to say to each other. The gravity of our situation taking a tremendous toll on both of us. Lucas displayed it more in his appearance than I did, his dark under eyes becoming more prominent every day. His messy hair, which was now respectfully gelled back, that he would always run his fingers through or tug in frustration as he tirelessly worked on finding that man, and the friend he spoke of. When Lucas had done a search of the underground dungeons only to find two cells open and free. Meanwhile, he did his investigation, I spent more time with the pack. They all had clustered near the front steps of the castle the night Lucas and I returned from the hospital, all of them angry and afraid of what happened and what was to come next. Some families didn't feel safe in their own homes, it didn't take much convincing for me to ask Lucas to let them stay here. We both couldn't bear an empty house.

We pulled out of the driveway and onto the road, taking the same path we had for the past week. All three of the tragic funerals I witnessed playing through the records of my brain as we drove.

"Pourquoi la vie est-elle comme ça?" I whispered, looking out the window.

(Why is life like this?)

There was a slight pause before Lucas answered. "Je ne sais pas."

(I don't know.)

I leaned my head against the window as I watched the outside world whiz past us. The trees turning into hazy blurs as we continued forward.

"You know" I started, "When I had first met Giuseppe, you told me that he wouldn't hesitate to tackle me." I stopped talking as Lucas nodded, remembering the memory. "The second you drove off, he turned to me and said 'I would hesitate to tackle you, Luna.' A smile tugged at my face as I faced Lucas, who also had the faint impression of one on his face.

"Sounds like something he'd say." He joked. I watched as he turned the wheel to pull into the cemetery. "Jesse-" He started but shook his head instead. "Never mind."

He parked the car, unbuckling his seat belt as I unlocked my door, stepping right back into the chilly winter air and into a heap of snow. I looked around the filled parking lot, people were exiting their cars and upon noticing us giving us a nod of their heads.

I shoved my hands into my pockets, as we both walked into the chapel. Once inside I relished the heat and set out to find Giuseppe's mother. After a quick glance around I found her sitting in the very front row, her white hair making her a dead giveaway. Walking in further I took in the number of people that were gathered here, looking around for too long and not at the sight in front of me it shouldn't have come to a surprise when I bumped into someone.

"Oh my God, I am so sorry Luna." The person hurriedly spoke out. I turned my face to look at them and a small gasp left my lips. The man lifted his eyebrows in confusion as to why I gasped.

"Its- it's alright, I was the one who wasn't looking..." I kept my stare on him, not even aware of the words that were spilling out of my mouth. I felt a warm presence behind me, and a small touch of my back.

"Dawn?" It was Lucas. "Everything alright?"

I nodded, still looking at the man in front of me.

The man cleared his throat, "Good morning, Alpha." To which Lucas gave a nod to. The man walked off and I found myself still staring at his form.

I licked my lips, "I thought he was Giuseppe... he looks just like him." I breathed out.

Lucas and I walked towards Giuseppe's mother. "That's Antonio, Jesse's older brother."

I simply nodded, we finally made it to her, she tried getting off the seat to greet us but I put my hand on her shoulder, to stop her. "Good morning, ma'am. How are you feeling?" I asked, and she shook her head.

"I don't think there's a word invented to describe it."

I frowned at her answer, Lucas had during this time, shook her hand respectfully, now the both of us were sitting down next to each other as the ceremony commenced. All of Giuseppe's family- which was quite a big family- gave their speeches, all of them having a little piece of him in their own beings.

Watching Giuseppe's mother grip her cane before she hobbled up to the podium, refusing any aid any of her other kids provided she made it there. She looked around the room, before glancing down at the closed casket. Not taking her eyes off of it she started speaking.

"I told everyone Jesse was my miracle, and in so many ways, he was. It was no secret that I struggled through this life- but my baby made it so much more bearable." Her voice wavering. "When he was younger, I think about 4, he told me that his purpose in this life was to make his momma smile, I only wish he was here to do it now." She turned to face us, "He was a sweet, sweet boy. Incredibly funny too, always making ill-fashioned jokes about his 'balls' as he liked to say." She laughed, wiping a tear that had fallen. "Hopefully one day, hopefully soon- I'll be able to see my little Jesse's smile." I watched as her face became overcome with sobs, I knew she had much more to say but she couldn't manage to speak it. Her small shaking form was escorted off the podium by Antonio, and she clutched onto the fabric of his suit. Not wanting to let go of him either.

No one moved, it seemed as if the end of the speeches was coming. I felt my heartstrings pull as I lifted myself slowly off the seat. I glanced down at Lucas who gave me a half-hearted smile as he moved his legs out of the way. I took steps toward the podium, my heels clicking against the wooden floor my hands started to feel clammy and I quickly rubbed them against my black coat. I looked down at the blue casket and already felt moisture accumulate in my eyes. I turned to face everyone who had now given me all of their attention. I licked my lips and let out a shaky breath before I started.

"In the short time Giuseppe and I had known each other, I had come to be fond of him. He was so respectful and incredibly charming, not afraid to bend the rules except when it came to addressing me." I heard a small chorus of laughter. "I told him that Luna was too formal and that it was alright to call me by my name." I shook my head, smiling at the memory. "his exact words being, 'No can do Luna, I would rather keep my balls.'" Now the whole room boomed with laughter, and I smiled down at Giuseppe's mom who was beaming up at me, wiping tears from her cheeks. I turned to face his coffin, leaving the podium behind as I walked towards him. I placed my hand on the cool surface of the blue coffin.

"Goodbye, Jesse."

short sad stupid chapter, (look at me using allusions, i didn't have to flex this hard) next chapter, phew... please buckle your seatbelts- the image i have painted in my mind of it is extremely intense. and i lowkey don't wanna write it but i have to for this book to continue.

: ( i miss my bby,