broken dreams-a seaycee story

two

Sean

___________

The day the crash happened, I had given her a promise ring. 

And I'd gained so much more, only to lose it.

*****FLASHBACK*******

"Sean," she tapped my nose lightly as I held her tightly, her head protectively snuggled into my chest as my fingers laced with her in our waltz. Perfect was playing through the speaker I'd brought and the waves made the gentlest crashing noise in the back. Her eyes were sparkling more than usual as they reflected the moon illuminating the ocean, and her skin was radiant under my hands. She was wearing a flowing white off the shoulder dress, and her hair was shining in its one, continuous, straightened wave. "I like your hair curled, you know," I smiled, smoothing back a loose strand. She crossed her eyes and blew it out of her face. "I don't."

"Why not? It's you," I grinned. 

"It's ugly," she frowned. I squeezed her hands tightly. "Nothing," I said, lifting her chin delicately, "About you could ever be ugly."

"You mean that?" she asked. I rolled my eyes, but I realized she was genuinely stricken. "Kayc," I sighed, stopping our dance. "Look at me. I'm your boyfriend. If you don't think you're absolutely stunning, then I haven't done my job. Not even close."

She sighed. "You have, believe me. I just-I see girls like Chloe, and I feel like I'm just never gonna be that way. Like, you deserve so much. You deserve the best person in the world."

"Kayc," I said again. "You are the best person in the world. I love you for everything you are."

"I don't see that sometimes," she sighed, referencing her confidence issues. "Or ever."

"I do," I said, taking her hands. "Look at me." Her big brown eyes beseeched mine. "I don't see anything that you're not. I don't think you 'aren't' anything," I said, making the quotes with my hands. "To me, Kayc, you're everything. And that's why," I said, breaking away from her and getting on my knee, withdrawing the box I'd stressed over carrying this whole night, "I want to promise you that you're my everything, through anything. Forever. I want this to be about us. I've known it from the minute I met you that I was in love with you, Kaycee. I want my life to have us in it, because I think that-"

And she pulled me to my feet and kissed me. "I love you," she murmured in my ear. "But how do you know? We're so young and I don't want you to leave me once you've seen the world and-"

"Kaycee, Kaycee, Kaycee," I sighed, shaking my head. "I've seen the world, already, a pretty damn good part of it. And I know now, hell, I knew it long ago, that my world isn't complete, it's barely even existing without you." She blinked away tears.

"Happy tears?" I asked as I rose from my knee and took her hand. I slipped the simple gold band on and watched it glint in the twilight. "Yes," she sniffled. "I've been waiting for that since I was 8 years old." I laughed in relief, pulling her back into the waltz, so happy that she was mine, she was finally mine, I'd finally solidified that nothing was going to break us, even with our crazy lives. I'd gotten my girl. "You have no idea how long I've been wanting to do that," I murmured against her hair. She stood on her tiptoes to kiss me and smiled against my lips. That, was one of my favorite feelings. I could never get enough of it. 

I took her on a walk down the beach as we told our parents and siblings each as we strolled, hand in hand, Kaycee admiring her ring and me admiring her. Once we'd gotten it through, she turned to me and slipped her cell phone into her pocket. 

"Sean?" she asked me, her eyes wide. Her shoulders begin to shake. Her anxiety. What had I done wrong? I rushed to steady her and I enveloped her with comfort. "Kaycee, Kaycee, baby, it's okay," I said, holding her tightly so she couldn't shake. "Talk to me baby, I'm here."

"You're going to hate me," she cried. 

"Hate you? Baby, baby, baby, no," I cried, kissing the crown of her head protectively. "Baby girl, I put that ring on your finger because I love you. Eternally. Through anything. That's not gonna change."

"Sean," her voice shook. "Now I need you to look at me."

"Anything," I said, and I let her go and settle into my arms as we faced the ocean. My hands wrapped around her stomach and I kissed the back of her neck. "What's up? Talk to me, princess, I know you have something on your mind. We were doing good with your anxiety training, something has to be pretty big to set that off again."

"I know," she said, melting down. "I'm just afraid you're gonna hate me."

"I could never," I said firmly. I leaned against her ear as we watched the moon billow out onto the ocean. "Now talk to me."

"Promise you'll love me no matter what?" 

"Easy," I said, moving one of my hands to run over the ring. "Easy."

"Okay," she said, and she took a deep breath. She faced me, her wind blowing in the ocean breeze and her eyes dark but fiercely ignited. Her hand in mine, she breathed out again and slowly placed my free hand on her stomach again. I faced her, unsure of what was going. My breath caught in my throat. 

"I'm pregnant, Sean."

And just like that, my world grew bigger. "You-you are?" I fumbled in disbelief. "Are-are you ok?" 
She laughed, but it wasn't a sorrowful laugh. "I'm okay. I know it's not the best timing, or really anything close to that, and I'm sorry if you didn't want to know, but I just figured since you gave me the promise ring I-" I shut her up by kissing her. I lifted up her tiny body, spun her around in the air, and brought her down gently, kissing her again and again and again. I took in her stomach. She was still tiny. "We made something?" I asked, my hand on her. "We did, yeah," she laughed, blinking away the tears. "I'm so glad you're not mad."

"Mad? How could I ever be?" I sighed, wiping away the tears of my own. "Kaycee, that's you. That's me. That baby is us. All I ever wanted was to start a family with you."

"Not now, though," she sighed. "It's horrible timing. I mean, I'm only 17 and with dance-"

"Hey," I said, pulling her close and kissing her forehead. "We'll figure it out, alright? We're you and me. We got this."

******************************

As we drove home, my hand was absentmindedly rubbing Kaycee's leg as she breathed out shakily. "I'm nervous for what my mom's gonna say," she admitted. I nodded. I was too. I was terrified Brad and Devon would kill me. Deep down, I was more than terrified. She was only 17. We had the money from World of Dance, and we had money from gigs, but we couldn't keep that coming in if she wasn't dancing. We were still kids. They would kill us. And we really hadn't answered many questions. Dance was her life. It was both of our futures. And I had taken away that from her. Oh God. "Hey," Kaycee said, squeezing my hand. "Like you said, we're gonna be ok."

"I know," I said, squeezing her hand back. "I know."

"Sean?" Kaycee said nervously. "That guy is driving this way."

"What do you mean?" I said, and I looked up.

A grey truck was speeding towards us. 

In our lane. Coming the opposite way of we were. 

My brain barely had enough time to process before I heard the glass shattering and Kaycee's screams as I jerked the wheel to no avail. The car rolled once, rolled twice, and I felt myself numbly be launched and land, and a dizzying sheet of black washed over me. "Kaycee," I tried, but I was long gone.

AN: hi guys. so here we go. new story, and we're hitting the ground running. i'd be lying if i said i wasn't crying right now. 

hope you guys are loving it though. maybe that's the wrong word. loving to hate it? maybe. i hope you're enjoying it, however we can put it :)

xoxo, kally jean