hopeless crush | ksj

| 16 |

a/n: ooooo ;) and once again there's religion things here don't come @ me, this is purely fictional

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× c o u r a g e  &  b a d  d e c i s i o n s ×

<jin's pov>

i woke up pretty early, i couldn't sleep even after i brought y/n back, i guess i was just too happy. I went to take a walk around the campsite to get some fresh air as my bunk smelled awful.

I walked all around the campsite, man it was pretty beautiful, the view, there was even a hill and you could see the sun rise there!!

I reached the canteen and thought of buying some coffee from the vending machine to start my day, but then i heard sounds??

I went to check, really quietly, then i saw..

I saw y/n and namjoon kissing, what the fuck man, you want to make out, at least make out somewhere more private ugh. Even though i was angry and jealous, i still couldn't help but feel heartbroken again.

Does she really love namjoon? Why did she not notice my hints?? And i thought i made things too obvious, well guess she's too oblivious of who loves her the most.

I quietly ran away, with angry and sad tears falling down my face. I went to the toilet to cry alone, praying that nobody would come in to see me like this. Guess i need a little more courage.. I smirked.

~during the sermon on the last day~

I was eyeing y/n the whole time, i was planning to finally make a move today. Don't find me creepy though, i just decided to be more brave.

Halfway through, y/n decided to go to the toilet. After she left, i went out of the auditorium and followed her. I waited till she came out and what i did next was pretty surprising to me too.

After she came out, i pushed her against the wall "hey y/n, I've been wanting to say this for the longest time ever, please listen to me" y/n looked kinda scared "yea sure but could you step away, i-"

"i like you, I've liked you for so damn long, i really don't know if you noticed me ever, but i guess you didn't because you got together with namjoon, i should have said it earlier y/n ah, it breaks my heart to see you so happy with him, because i feel like i can give you way more that he can, and now, I'm gonna do something that im very sure i will not regret doing, i don't care if you're with namjoon, i just need to do this now so at least i can feel better" i can't believe i confessed. I looked her in the eye, then down her lips, she was biting her bottom lip nervously, and then, i kissed her.

She didn't hesitate to kiss me back and our tongues were just fighting for dominance, i won obviously and continued, it was pretty heated. Well her lips looked pretty swollen after. But then she suddenly pulled away, looked at me and said "I'm so sorry jin.... What have i done..." and she quickly ran away. I don't know where she went, because she looked back and said "don't.follow. me."

<y/n's pov>

Halfway through the sermon, i suddenly felt the need to go to the bathroom, so i went and after i came out, i was shocked to see jin there, it was as if he had been waiting for me.

I got pushed against the wall, i was telling jin to back off a little when he confessed to me... Is this real, he just confessed to me!! My heart was beating so fast and so loudly, i hoped jin didn't hear it. Then he kissed me.

I don't know why, even though i am with namjoon right now, I still didn't hesitate to kiss him back. The kiss was rough, yet passionate and loving.

Wait y/n what are you thinking!! Why are you kissing him back!! Those thoughts were running through my mind constantly during the kiss. I then woke up and pushed him away. "I'm so sorry jin.... What have i done....... Don't. Follow. Me." I said as i ran away, with hot tears rolling down fast. What have i fucking done.... I cheated on namjoon....

What do i do now?? Why did i even kiss him back!!! Omg y/n you are so stupid!! Why would you do such a foolish thing knowing it's wrong? I ran back to the bunk, i had the key as i was the bunk ic. I opened the door and sat on my bed hopelessly, i continued crying... "What have i done..." I said again and again as i continued crying. I just wondered what would happen if i told namjoon.. He'll definitely be so heartbroken, i don't want to break his heart.. He's so sweet, i don't want gossip going around.. I kept thinking and debating if i should tell him, and i finally made a decision.

I will tell namjoon. He deserves to know it. And if we break up because of this, I don't care if he doesn't forgive me, i just hope he won't cry over me and move on, and find his partner and just be happy, i deserve this if we break up.