Introverted By My Thoughts [✓]

Traverse

Last night,
I time travelled back to the past.
Three years ago, to the four corner wall room of a boy who was about to give up hope.
I watched him cry himself to sleep every night,
Taking comfort in the cuddle of his pillow.
And at sunrise, it was left to dry from the tears that soaked it wet.
I watched him scroll tirelessly through the screen of his mobile phone,
Searching for happiness in a news feed,
Or message received;
Messages he never opened.
Loved ones texting complimentary gestures to him:

"Hey, Hi, How're you doing?"

But there was never a reply.
He could have bring himself to answer their questions.
What should he tell them?

"There is nothing good happening in my life,
Except the depression that is eating me alive."

He couldn't just do it,
So he stayed silent, and watched himself get eaten alive.

"Why would anyone want to hear that?
I mustn't look weak.
You all should just leave me ALONE!
You'll never understand."

Yet, everyday, he scrolled through all their messages,
Looking for a reason to be angry;
At something, At someone, At himself.
Eventually,
Everyone stopped texting.

"He's a snub, ignore him."

But he was slowly dying,
With no courage to call for help.
One night, I watched him bleed.
Bleed so much, his heart stopped racing.
I wanted to tell him, Everything was going to be okay.
I wanted hug him and tell him it was going to be fine.
I wanted to tell him all the hate and pain he felt, was only temporary.
But I said it in my heart,
With silent tear drops, scrolling down my cheeks.
Because time travel back to the future;
Everything he said and did,
Made me as strong as I am today.
If I ever had the chance to change anything from my past,
I wouldn't.
Every pain you've felt,
was designed to make you stronger.
It's only temporary,
So don't get lost in a moment like I almost did.