I Complain Too Much

Rant 3: I'm going to talk about shark week shamelessly - shock horror!

I literally update this more than my fiction books....that is a lil bit worrying. Oh well. I thought it'd be like once a month sort of thing. It's had three updates in just over a week.

Oops.

Oh well. Anyway, as the title (which at this point I haven't figured out yet) will tell you, I'm here to complain about something that those humans who happen to possess the parts that cause an unpleasant monthly event deal with. But I'm not gonna just go 'periods suck' and complain about a painful one or anything like that. Besides, I'm not dealing with it right this minute thank the universe. No. I'm here for a different reason.

Because here's a question for you. Why is it a bad thing to discuss your period in public? At least, it is in England and probably in other places. Why am I a criminal for telling someone that I have period cramps? Is that a bad thing, to deal with something that literally every person who happens to have the genitalia required for such an event? Are we bad people for speaking up about the fact that we're in pain?

Here's the thing. The boys (genitalia here and also gender) cringe whenever we bring up the idea of periods. 'They're gross, why are you talking about them in front of me'. 'Oh my god I didn't need to know that'.

Yeah well I didn't need to know about your dick but you don't seem to be respecting that either.

I'm not saying all boys are like this. They're not. And I really do understand that. I'm talking about a certain type of boy, that I like to call the 'sex is vital for life and I'm obsessed with my dick size'. I'm sure you know some in your own life. It's not exactly a rare breed. No offence lads. Don't mean to be rude. But I'm sure you've seen them as well.

One of my favourite poets, Rupi Kaur, describes this idea quite well, and I'd like to share her summary of it. Please forgive if the quote isn't exact, it's been a while since I've read the book it's from, but here it is. 'The recreational use of my body is beautiful, but its inner workings are ugly'.

Things like periods and the menopause are like taboo for a lot of us. Don't talk about it. Don't mention it. Don't leave signs that it exists. Be ashamed if you leak onto something, because you should have been more careful.

Sometimes you have no warning. And that's okay. I'm not sorry for mentioning it on here, because I don't think I need to be. I have a body. Oh my god. That's horrible. How could I possibly be so open about something that I should keep to myself?

Sure, the body is a personal thing. I agree and completely understand that frame of mind. But the experience of periods is something that I talk about with my friends. Those of you who also have the misfortune of dealing with them - do you do the same? And do you feel ashamed to say 'shark week is back, I wanna fucking die'?

People talk about their sexual exploits and their relationships in public. They mention personal things that they probably wouldn't want others hearing about in clear earshot. And yet someone with periods isn't allowed to discuss the pain they feel with another 'sufferer' because their body is strangling itself, due to the fact that it's 'disgusting'.

Let me put this into perspective.

Imagine that you have had a very calm month. You didn't feel any signs of a period. Nothing at all, no warning. And at the moment they're irregular, so you can never predict them at all. You rely on the signs. Which haven't happened. So you're safe, right? You go to bed, calm, and sleep the whole night. All is chill and relaxed.

And then in the morning you're in pain, you've ruined your favourite PJs, and there's a little red spot on the sheets.

That is bad enough. And then a parent or housemate sticks their head round the door. 'Hey, are you - oh shit. Why didn't you act more careful? You've ruined your fave PJs and your sheets! Now they're gonna be cleaned basically right now otherwise they'll stain, and you can't do anything to solve it. Why didn't you wear something to keep safe during the night?'

So you're already beating yourself up. And then you get humiliated by someone else.

Not fun, I can tell you that. And then to have to change in the bathroom and hope nobody can hear you. It's horrible.

All because we believe that we are in the wrong to not notice that it appeared in the middle of the night.

Consider this. Without that same 'shameful' event, without that pain and without that body strangling itself (because that's what it does. You're welcome, those of you who don't experience them, that's what we go through), those crazy hormones every month, humanity as a species wouldn't exist. So they're pretty damn important.

You would not be reading this if your mother/person that birthed you did not experience that.

Doesn't that put it into perspective a little?

And don't get me started on the hormones. You're already in pain, and if you don't feel pain, I genuinely envy you, and your head hurts and you're tired. And then suddenly, you hate yourself. And you want chocolate and hugs. Preferably both as quickly as possible.

So I think we need to stop making such a fuss, basically. I know that there are some situations where you shouldn't mention them anyway - when eating tomato related food for example. Or at a funeral.

But with your friends in public?

I don't think that's such a crime.

The emotions my hormones give me when shark week does roll around actually help me to write angst, or extreme feels. Because I am an emotionless mess most of the time and I can't feel anything. So in a sense I wouldn't have half the writing power I currently have, however strong that is for you (whatever that's supposed to mean), without that.

So lets be a little less judgemental of the period sufferers. Because we just want chocolate. And sleep. In that order.

Thoughts?

(Also when I first did the title it had 'get ready' before 'I'm gonna talk about shark week' and it was too many characters. Oops. Wattpad is done with my shit. But at least I figured something to put, right?)