the after story SQUIP x Reader

fight pain with more pain

(Does anyone understand this reference. no. just me, okay.)

WARNING: THIS CONTAINS CUTTING

After lunch, I had more classes

none of which I had with (S/N).

and I was happy

(S/N) had all of his classes with Chloe.

And he was happy

Chloe had her dream guy.

And she was Happy

The voices were getting the best of me

And they were happy

SQUIP didn't know about them

And he was happy.

but I wasn't happy

I might have said I was but I'm not

I feel as if I'm drowning in a flood of tears

but they never came out

I don't know why I feel this way

I wanted them to get together

but I didn't know it would hurt this much

I debate telling him

but if I told him my problems

he would be weighed down

and it would be my fault

he won't be happy

she won't be happy

I want them to be happy

so I'll be a safe

and I'll stay locked

I won't slip up this time

I can't lose anyone else

(Y/N)'s POV

I was writing poems in my classes about how I felt. God, I hope no one finds it. Once the school day ended I went to my locker to grab my stuff. I put textbooks in my bag and walk down the stairs to the doors.

"(Y/N) wait!"

I turned around to see (S/N) being dragged by Chloe. I chuckled at the sight. I got stung and now I wasn't the one laughing. I put a smile on my face to hide the pain that struck me in the chest every time I see them.

"Did you really think you would leave without us."

"Well, I was about to, Yeah."

"Ha."

"Oh (Y/N), I forgot to tell you that I and Chloe are going on a date today. are you fine with that?"

"Hey, as long as your happy I'm happy."

'lies'

"Okay well see you tomorrow."

and just like that, he was gone. up and out the door leaving a broken ceramic on the ground that no one wants to touch or fix. I walked out the door and on my way home. I stopped at a 7/11 and picked up a Mt.Dew Voltage for the next day because according to my Gym teacher I don't have enough energy.

I also picked up a couple Mt.Dew Solar Flare for that night and the next day. I felt like I was slowly killing my insides by drinking that stuff. I walked the rest of the way home dinking The Solar Flare so SQUIP could spend time on his date.

once I got home I went to my room and started to work on my homework it was hard to concentrate when your heart is shattered. I thought about the last time it was hard to concentrate when it hurt too much to think. I promised myself I would never do it again but it was hard. I went to the kitchen grabbed a knife that was small enough to cut berries.

I pulled up my pants and put a big cut on my thigh but it didn't hurt. it felt like a sense of release when I did it. it hurt less to do this. I went back upstairs and finished my homework, and went to bed.