Mine

31 - Resurrection

Stray hairs whip around my face as I stand on the very end of the pier. My legs dangling off the end and my bottom firmly sat on the wood. The tide is right up to the halfway point of the pier and all the people have left. It's 7:56pm. All my fears have gone, I'm being brave. That's not a hard thing to say, it's just a hard thing to do. I can't see much of the sea because it's too dark. I can hear it though. The stars aren't out yet, the moon is. It's reflection is plastered onto the sea. I close my eyes and raise my chin up, being confident with my actions.

This is it. This is the starting point for all the drama. Soon, everything will become real. I'll have to let my mind realise that. Now's the moments where my actions count for my future. When they're most important. Whether I can do this or not, I don't know. But I don't have a choice. I never did. Not really. If you look at my life from certain perspectives. There's always a time when you think everything can go wrong, that you don't think you're ready. Truthfully, I don't think anyone's ever ready. Everyone is scared of making a daring move that makes a dramatic change. Believe me, I know. People are different, but there's beauty in that. How we are all our own person and have our own minds. Different talents, different fetishes, different appearences. There's billons of people in the world, every single one different from the other. Yet none of us are alone in the world. No, none of us. You can think you are, but you're probably wrong. In fact, you are wrong.

Thinking is another way of the mind to express itself. We all think differently. Sure, we can have the same ideas but not all the time. I love difference. It makes me feel special because there's only one of me. You should feel special too. We're all made the same techniqally, though. For example, good and bad is a balance of nature we all have inside us. Even amounts. But it's where you're line of balance is that make you who you are and how you think. It's where you stand. Good or bad. The best is a balance between the two, just blurring the good and bad into one emotion. But nobody's perfect like that. Sometimes the line moves around, bad thoughts can enter your mind and influence your behaviour. Many people find it easy to control, others don't. I'm saying too much bad isn't good and that's not the point because really, too much good is bad too.

Eva is sitting beside me, her legs are crossed and not dangling over the bridge like mine are. She stirred beside me. I could feel her calmness swarming from her though; her heart was steady and her breathing was normal. It was a good thing she was so calm because it helped me stay calm too. I mean, I was freaking out just a little bit but now I'm good. I think. Time is painfully slow. This is killing me, waiting for this stupid person to turn up. What if they never do? Yeah I guess that's good in a way but it's also bad. If they don't turn up we're no closer to winning the dumb war. Therefore, to make this work they have to show up. I don't care if it's a trap anymore. At least we're making a move. That's the important thing that needs to happen. Otherwise, there's no point anymore. Why keep becoming so scared and so depressed instead of acting and doing something about it?

"When do you think the person's going to get here?" I whispered to Eva. Eva's lips curved up into a small smile and she gave me a glance.

Eva murmured and faced forward "soon"

Right. Soon. That's all she could say though, I guess. Eva and I have grown quite close. Ironic how she's supposed to be the 'evil cheerleader' in my small fairy tale. At least, that's how I dreamed it when I was first crushing on Jake. I never thought I'd ever be friends with her but I'm glad I am because I judged her. I shouldn't have done that. Nobody deserves to be judged by appearance, it's just so easy to do. I knew I shouldn't but I couldn't help myself. Human nature just presses forward. Oh and before you start to rant at me saying I'm a werewolf who doesn't have human nature, just remember werewolves are half human. Please.

Along the sea, I saw a few seagulls bobbing up and down the waves. I wonder what it would be like to fly, soar into the air. Feel so free, go anywhere you like and have a magnificent birds eye view of cities and forests. That would be truly amazing. I can only wish to know what that would be like. Then again...I can't go being greedy. I mean, I'm already a werewolf with awesome abilities and a soul mate for life. Okay, I won't rub it in anymore. Don't worry, I'll stop. I promise.