Talks with the Mirror

Dix Chapter - Valentine's Day

2019

It's that time of the year, y'all. It's here! It's the day couples use as an excuse to pretend to love each other more, and also the day where restaurant workers wish they could slip on their disgusting floors and accidentally cut open their own guts.

On the other side of this glamorous day are the singles. My team. We matter too, you know?

And on this side there are only two types of people: the ones that hate Valentine's Day, and the ones that don't give a crap about it.

You can guess which side I'm on as I continue to write this chapter.

To some people, V-day (as I choose to call it for the sake of not having to write nine letters a million times) is pretty equivalent to hell. They hate the idea that couples are happy, and that businesses makes tons money simply by selling disproportionately sized stuffed animals and half-assed chocolates. And in today's world of social media everyone is trying to up their game. So you are getting these luxurious (looking) pictures of romantic nights, and everyone is just looking SO DARN GOOD. 

I mean, barbers are making money, hair stylist, nail artists, and don't even get me started on the waxing industry... and the 'toy' stores. 

The people that hate V-day want all of these things gone, and they probably believe that the day should be all about love. All about companionship. All about... us.

But nah, the world doesn't survive off these little less than relevant emotional blah-blahs. We need Insta posts, Facebook status updates, couple tattoos, waste of money, and, most importantly, we need people to have an excuse to remember to love each other. Or whatever other words are used to define the day as materialistic yet good-hearted.

When I was a kid the only thing I thought about V-day was that everyone got layed on the same night. Meaning that my little ingenious brain believed that people didn't have coitus unless it was their wedding day, honey-moon, birthday, or V-day. Therefore I didn't see the purpose of giving your own wife flowers since she was already yours. Yeah, I also believed that treating your partner with affection would only be done in the beginning stages of trying to tie them down, and after that all of the things you do to win someone over would be put on the shelf. By the same logic, I thought that in V-day couples would pretty much carry on with their day as usual, and then at some point at night drop their pants and get down to business.

Anyways, childhood memory roasting apart, I have now to cover the people that don't care at all about V-day. 

We are simple people, I tell ya. We just want to go to bed at the same time as yesterday. We don't eat chocolate 'cause we healthy. We don't need no stuffed animals 'cause we of age. We don't wanna waste money on things we will only enjoy for a single day 'cause we broke and cheap. We are the ones who actually would go all fuckin' out on V-day if we weren't single. You see, while we are single we don't care because we have no one to pamper. But let the amazing miracle that is to find someone come to us, and it will be the fiesta of the century. 

Since I used the word 'we' you already know which group I belong to. 

I'm not this goblin that hates everyone who has what I want, but I'm still not gonna spend the day celebrating love if I'm not feeling it. And I know, there's this little group of singles that will say that V-day is about celebrating ALL love rather than just the romantic one, but cupid doesn't hit you with an arrow so you can go hug your best-friend. He does it so that you go get yourself sooooome (I apologize for the terminology, I just wanted to sound cool).

There is nothing cuter than noticing a couple that celebrates V-day in their own way. Maybe they get away to fuck. Or go somewhere nice to fuck. Or just eat somewhere special... and then go home to fuck. Sometimes there are these really old couples out on the town enjoying the fresh air and each other's company. They just make me wonder, "how the heck do they manage to fuck without breaking a hip?" 

And after that kinda disgusting thought, I also appreciate the fact that they are out there together, maybe for many years now, and they still find a way to make each other feel special. True companions. 

I want that, and anyone would be dumb not to want that.