one plus six. || hoseok x bts

【one】

"rise and shine motherfuckers~" seokjin called out, their tone resembling a song more than actual words.

hoseok groaned into his pillow, snuggling into the warmth of his quilt. it really was too early for this shit.

"not now you horny whorebag, it's 7 in the fucking morning!" jimin roared, throwing a chimmy plushie at them. they easily dodged the attack, crouching to pick the abandoned doll up.

"exactly! that's 7 hours of potential productivity wasted because of your precious nappy time!" seokjin retorted, hurling the plushie back at the petite figure glaring at him, which he caught with ease.

"what, you got a problem with my sleeping schedule?" jimin challenged petulantly, his tone laced with feigned annoyance.

"yeah and what about it? d'you wanna go a round, huh bitch?"

"step the fuck up hoe, let's go a few!"

the two angrily glared at each other, their pupils blown wide and unblinking.

a tired jungkook knocked on the open door of hoseok and jimin's shared room, twisting his neck and adjusting his shoulder blades.

"good morning gays-" he grunted, twisting his waist one more time before heading away. jimin and seokjin stared at each other, completely unfazed.

"shut the fuck up" jimin yelled, raising a well manicured eyebrow at seokjin

"jungkook stop bothering us and have the bathroom first you straight motherfucker"

"yay thanks hyungs" only the fluttering tuft of jungkook's unruly bed hair could be seen as he raced to the bathroom excitedly.

"wait no! why would you do that, you crazy moron?"

"cause we're apparently engaged in a staring contest, ya strawberry pimp. therefore, you are unavailable at the moment. the bathroom is empty, hence jungkook has the right to use it first" seokjin explained, his gaze unfaltering.

"ugh you win," jimin eventually mumbled, sliding off his bed.

"good boy" seokjin teased.

"shut it, doll face."

"hey!"

"just kidding, love ya bitch!"

"go brush your teeth you morning breath fucker! now go steal the bathroom back!" seokjin laughed heartily.

they then turned to a half asleep hoseok, gently nudging him, tutting to themself when hoseok showed no sign of attempting to wake up. technically hoseok was already awake, (thanks to seokjin and jimin's deafening loud exchange) but since he's "a lazy cutie pie" (jimin's words, not his) he was naturally inclined to lying in bed for a couple more minutes before actually getting up and starting his day.

"curses!" they sighed dramatically,

"whatever shalt i do with thy sleepy arseth?"

hoseok giggled lightly, trying to pretend that he was still asleep.

"if thou has no desireth to waketh, i shalt tickle the fucketh out of you, m'darling." then, cold fingers landed on the side of hoseok's abdomen. well, shit.

"oh god no...please!" hoseok laughed loudly, seokjin's merciless tickles all over his torso.

"okayiyieldyouwinpleasedontticklemeanymore" the raven haired dancer squeaked, eyes laced with tears of forced mirth.

"ok baby, you have to wake the fuck up now, i gotta go check up on the kitchen before someone touches the food or sets the house on fire!" seokjin suddenly exclaimed, hurrying downstairs.

hoseok lazily stretched his bones, and got up from his bed. good morning world.