Say No To This

6

Lin's POV

Pippa had said yes to a date and I was so eager that I couldn't even sit still. Scarlett and Seb had a sitter for the few hours and I was nervous. Only because I really liked her.

We were planning a little quiet dinner. Only because we knew it would be somewhat relaxing for both of us. I knocked on her door, and heard it click open.

Pippa was gorgeous. She had her hair half pulled back and she had a smile on her face. A small one. Not too big, but just enough to show her happiness.

"Ready to go?" I asked, still blown away at her beauty.

"Yeah, I just have to do something real quick." She said while opening the door for me. I took a step in and shut the door behind myself as she walked down the hall towards her bedroom. I looked over at the little chest near the front door. There were so many pictures hung up around her apartment, but these were different.

There was one with Steve holding Scarlett as a baby. I couldn't help but smile, and feel terrible since I missed those years. Another picture was  of the three of them together at a show. I couldn't even imagine what she must be going through...

Yeah, I divorced my wife, but I still got to see her. Pippa didn't even get to say a proper goodbye... Nothing. Just went to bed expecting him to be there the next day and he was gone. I felt extremely guilty for asking her out now. What if it was too soon for her?

"Okay, I'm ready." I looked up to see her putting in earnings and wearing shoes now.

"Let's go." I gave her a soft smile, and began to walk towards the door. The feeling of guilt was going to eat me alive during dinner now.

We got to the restaurant a little early, I stood next to Pip as we waited for our table to be ready.

"So, how is work?" I asked her.

"Well.." She shrugged her shoulders and looked at me. "It's work." She chuckled. "I like teaching the kids, but I just wish I was doing more. But I can't." She shrugged again. "What about you?" She asked.

"Well, I turned down a movie offer." I mumbled.

"What??" She gasped. "Why??" She asked.

"I would have to film in London, so I decided not to do that. Can't be too far from the kids." I gave a small smile and saw her nod her head slowly.

Our table was soon ready and we were both seated quickly.

"Here is the wine list and menus." Our waiter smiled while setting the small books on the table.

"Thank you." I smiled at him. "Do you still drink?" I asked her.

"No. I don't. Thank you for asking." She smiled. I pushed the wine list away from both of us, respecting her wishes.

We ordered small appetizers to share and eventually started talking about life.

"Pip... I have a question.. Why didn't you try to reach out when Scarlett was little? I would've helped then." I frowned.

"I was scared. I had just barely graduated college. I didn't want to do anything. I thought my life was over." She sighed. "But when Scarlett was born.. I knew I had to keep going just for her." She explained to me. "And, I felt if I reached out, people would see it as some horrible thing." She frowned.

"Because?" I asked.

"Because of who you were then. You were getting your foot in the door with all your musicals... I couldn't ruin it for either of us." She admitted.

"Pip.." I started.

"I know. You would've helped. But you were going to get married too when I put all the pieces together... So I took a step back and left it alone. I did just fine on my own." I could tell she was beginning to put her wall back up. I noticed it the first time we met. She was defensive and quick to hide. Once I knew why, it made sense.

"I'm not trying to make you upset... I just.. I saw pictures of baby Scarlett in your apartment... And I felt terrible for missing out on so much..." I sighed.

"Oh." She frowned.

"Can we talk about something else? And maybe start the date over?" I chuckled.

"Yeah, I would like that." Pippa let out a small laugh. Her eyes lit up again, I did have a real chance with her.

Pippa's POV

Lin was easy to talk to, but hard to tell everything to. He asked deep questions, and I didn't even know answers to them for myself.

Once we finished, we took a cab to my place and he walked me up.

"So... I know it's probably way too soon to tell, but maybe a second date?" He smiled his cheeky smile at me.

"I'll have to think about it." I answered with a small smile. "Thank you for tonight. I really liked it."

"You're welcome." He shuffled a bit, obviously still nervous.

"I'll talk to you later." I walked into my apartment and felt like I could finally breathe. I placed my back against the door and slid down slowly. Tears began to silently fall as I sat on the floor.

It was really too soon.