a brief inquiry into online relationships {tyler joseph}//UNDERGOING EDITING

♡ 2:22 am ♡

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2:22 am

daisyy: I need you.

tylerrjoseph: I'm here. what's wrong?

daisyy: my legs are throbbing. I'm on the verge of sobbing and I've tried everything. I don't know what to do.

tylerrjoseph: aww my daisy. don't worry, I'll stay up with you until you fall asleep.

daisyy: thank you.

daisyy: I can't stop crying. It's all too much.

tylerrjoseph: give me your phone number. I need you to hear my voice.

daisyy: 555-723-2267

——

"daisy, can you hear me okay?" Tyler asks through the phone. The pulsing in my legs is overbearing and it's taking everything in me to not scream. I manage to choke out a response,

"yeah." he sighs and the tears continue to flow down my face at a raging pace. I've never felt this much pain in my life.

"listen to me." he starts. "this pain you feel is temporary. it's going to pass. you, my daisy, will be just fine. just listen to the sound of my voice, look around the room you're in and take in everything you see. notice how the moon shines brightly, and how you and I are looking at that very same moon. I'm with you daisy, always. you are strong, you are invincible, you are unstoppable, you will get through this. I promise." the pain was strong but the emotion was stronger, I still couldn't stop the tears from flowing. but this time I didn't care. I had the boy I had grown to care for so deeply on the phone with me, the sound of his voice flowed through the room and into my ears. the most beautiful sound I'd ever heard.

"tyler, I don't know why this has to happen. it's so unfair. I try to smile through it and be the brave girl everyone wants me to be, but it's so hard. I try to be strong for everyone but I don't know if I can keep it up for much longer. you say that I'm strong, but how can I be strong if I feel so weak?" I felt so vulnerable, too vulnerable. I felt like my soul was naked. I'm used to a lot of feelings, but this one I'm a stranger to.

"daisy." he says, breaking the silence. "do you know that saying that everyone seems to swear by? 'you're allowed to have one good cry and then you have to get over it.'. have you ever heard it?" I sigh and muster out,

"yes. it's one I've had pounded in my head over and over again" it's true. motivational speakers, therapists, even doctors have said a version of that saying before. I feel like my only choice is to believe it.

"I'm gonna tell you something, and I really need you to listen." he begins, I straighten up a little bit and wait intently for what he has to say. "it's bullshit. all of it is complete and utter bullshit. you are going to cry. you are going to cry so hard that you will ache. multiple times. but that is part of healing. you know what makes you strong? the fact that you are sitting here with me on the phone right now and admitting that it hurts. saying that you're hurting is the strongest thing you can do, because admitting something like that is one of the most difficult things someone can do. you are strong, daisy. you are so far away from weak. you have to believe me with all your heart when I tell you that. do you believe me?" I sigh, feeling the pulsing in my legs finally start to slow down. the tears are mostly dry, although a few fresh ones are starting to brew.

"I believe you." I whisper, just loud enough for him to hear it.

"you know something daisy?" he asks.

"hm?" I can hear my heart beating in my chest, but this time it almost feels comforting.

"even when you're crying, the sound of your voice is still the most beautiful thing I've ever heard." my heart is burning in the most beautiful way right now.

"I could say the same about you, ty." I responded. he chuckled and I feel like we both started to feel exhaustion take over the both of us. "hey ty?"

"yeah?"

"can you sing to me? please?" he chuckled once more and the sound brought a sleepy smile to my face.

"anything for you. what do you want me to sing?" he asked.

"whatever you want. anything you sing sounds beautiful." he scoffed playfully and I could hear him clear his throat softly. soon, the sound of a familiar melody filled the room.

"you say things with your mouth, cobwebs and flies come out.
but I hear a second voice behind your tongue somehow.
luckily I can read your mind
flies and cobwebs unwind
they will not take you down,
they will not cast you out.

dear friend,
here we are again pretending to understand how you think your world is ending.
sending signals and red flags in waves,
it's hard to tell the difference between blood and water these days.
I'll pray that one day you'll see,
the only difference between life and dying,
is one is trying.
that's all we're gonna do, so try to love me
and I'll try to save you.

won't you stay alive? I'll take you on a ride
I will make you believe
you are lovely.
won't you stay alive? I'll take you on a ride
I will make you believe
you are lovely."

the song rang through the room and the smooth, velvet like sound of his voice slowly put me to sleep. the sound felt like lavender, like butterscotch, like honey, like all of the nicest things that I've ever felt combined into one sound. the pounding in my legs finally ceased, my face was finally dry, and just for a moment I felt comfortable. I felt safe, I felt warm, for once in my life, I felt whole.

                                        ♡
A/N: this is the longest chapter I've ever written for this book. I was gonna upload this tomorrow but I'm  just so proud of it that I have to update it now. I love you all.