Missing You Every Step Of The Way (Bellarke)

S2 - Firesides

Guys 310 reads is AMAZING!! Thank you sooo much for reading my work (I'm not sure why) but I really appreciate it! Hope you enjoy this chapter!

The crackling of ember and flame lit alive the ground around it as shadows danced across the tree trunks, casting the woods in an eerie glow. The rhythmical chirping of crickets was constant yet calming and firelight illuminated the grounds of a small camp among the trees that was occupied by three figures; two of which lay slumbering.

Bellamy sat, hands clasped, on a log. No matter how much he wanted to, his mind and consciousness were too awake to even think about the embrace of sleep. That and the fact that he was keeping watch since he wasn't about the let the two people around him be left unguarded; even if he hadn't slept in 2 days.

Clarke had said they all needed sleep but that had been 3 hours ago and Bellamy's thoughts were firmly directed to that of Finn and how much he had changed. He knew it had been the wrong judgement call to let Finn and Murphy go alone, along with two automatic rifles, but at the time it had been so easy just to go along with it. The gunshot still echoed throughout Bellamy's head as he had been made to watch the one-eyed Grounder slump to the ground, dead. That was the moment that Bellamy had seen the first sliver of inhumanity, he'd ever seen in Finn's eyes.
Although, Finn was supposed to be the peacemaker, not the antagonist and it seemed that Bellamy had been too preoccupied to notice Finn slipping into his old shoes the moment he was out of them; seeing that unflinching pull of the trigger replaying was a sobering reminder.

Bellamy almost cringed at a time when he wouldn't have hesitated to do the same to protect Octavia. But since meeting Clarke he knew there were other ways to protect people that didn't involve killing. At least to some extent.

The fire crackled sharply and Bellamy shifted himself on the log as his eyes drifted over to rest on Octavia over the flames. His mind swam with the memory of leaving her with Lincoln and the utter relief of finding her again; though even he could tell she wasn't the same. Physically, her hair had changed and he noticed, with disdain, that it was distinctly Grounder-like in appearance. Though, mentally he wasn't so sure. She seemed more and more like a stranger to him nowadays despite his love for her stoking the worrisome older brother in him.

It seemed that being on the ground had changed them all from their former selves.

Bellamy looked back at the fire before he felt his gaze drift to Clarke who a lay asleep on his blanket. After they'd settled he insisted she'd take it since she hadn't had any time to recover before she went back out into the woods after only arriving at camp the day before. His eyes trailed over the scratches and stitches on her face, neck and hands and felt the familiar dull pain of remorse at all that she had seen.

The peaceful yet slightly laboured breathing of the girl next to him relaxed Bellamy a little and he noticed that simply being in her proximity made him more focussed and calm. She had been the only one to give him the confidence to make decisions as a leader since Bellamy now felt that the decision to let Finn go in his state, would have ended very differently had Clarke been there. Though as he watched her sleep, a part him stirred and became aware that he was caring more and more about Clarke's wellbeing. Nevertheless, not seeing the furrow in her brow or worry in her eyes, but instead seeing the peacefulness of her features during sleep was something altogether new to him; eyes softening as he looked at her.

Clarke's consciousness awoke her before feeling a pair of eyes, she knew all too well, on her; her eyes fluttered open. She shifted her head to meet Bellamy's gaze and allowed a small smile to form. Bellamy seemed to notice it and quickly looked away as if he'd been caught gazing a little too long. Though now that Clarke saw his troubled expression, she knew his mind was on something else; on those they were searching for.