Habits Of My Heart

Chapter 5

"Wait where are you going?" Adrian asked Bailey, who was putting his shoes on, getting ready to leave.

"Tristan wanted me to go shopping with him for the party tonight." Bailey answered, finishing up the bow on his shoelaces.

"So you and Tristan are all buddy-buddy, huh?" Adrian said, and Bailey nodded.

"I don't know if... That's the best idea."

Bailey looked at him questioningly, "What do you mean? He's really nice."

"Yeah but he's like... Weird. All queer and stuff." he said, "It's probably not good for your reputation here if you hang out a lot with him, you know. Kind of like social suicide."

Bailey seemed puzzled, "That's not very nice, though. Why should me hanging out with him ruin my reputation?"

"Uh- I- I don't know, what if people think you're gay too?"

Bailey shrugged, "Okay. Then what?" he said, "They can think what they want, right? Plus, what's wrong with being gay?" he tried to hide the concern in his voice. Is this what Adrian thought? Bailey wasn't sure what he was, but considering he thought about dick more than half of the time, he surely wasn't straight.

Adrian was dumb-founded, "Um, I don't know, nothing, I guess." he sighed, "Anyway, the social system here is weird. If you take my advice you'll do fine. See how well I'm doing? But you can do whatever you want, really. Just don't expect me to want you around me if everyone thinks you're a weirdo."

Ouch, okay, wow. Just another shot right at his heart. He furrowed his eyebrows, begining to hate this side of Adrian more and more. He stood up.

"Whatever, if that's the kind of person you are then I don't want to be around you either way." he said, "You shouldn't care so much about your social status that you won't be with people who are actually nice."

And with that, he left, closing the door behind him, not bothering to make sure it closed quietly.

"But I really don't understand why it should matter so much. It shouldn't be what decides who his friends are."

Bailey and Tristan had decided to sit down for a while, taking a break, and were sitting on a little round table, eating donuts.

Tristan hummed, nodding, and chewing his donut. He swallowed and opened his mouth to speak, "Yeah he's like that. It's kind of what made my crush on him go away."

"Is he homophobic?" Bailey asked.

Tristan's eyebrows drew together in thought and he shook his head hesitantly, "I don't think so. Not more than anyone else at least. Like he doesn't hate gays, but I guess he thinks it's weird. Like everyone else does."

Bailey frowned, "That's a little mean. It's natural, isn't it? Liking the same gender?"

Tristan shot him a strange look, a little bemused, "That's not what most people think. You should know that. You act like you don't know."

His eyes widened, "I- I was home working for my dad most of the time. I don't know much about the outside world. Sorry."

"That's fine." Tristan said, understanding, "So are you straight?"

Bailey, who was lifting up a donut, stilled and looked up, thinking. He then finally looked back at Tristan, "I don't think so. I'm not sure what I am. I didn't really know many girls after the age of 12, after puberty. But I'm pretty sure I'm into boys at least." he said, and hurriedly added, "But don't tell anyone! I'm not sure yet, I don't want people knowing just yet."