Key to a Caged Heart

Good as Hell

Eren poured syrup onto his pancakes in a spiral pattern, ensuring every bite would be coated in sugary goodness. It was also an excuse to keep his head down and hide his heavy eye bags from the people sitting across from him.

"You didn't have to drive all this way," Eren said, even though he already said it on the phone when these breakfast plans were made.

"Nonsense! We haven't heard from you in weeks. How's it crack-a-lackin, Eren dearest?"

"You know," Eren shrugged, still not meeting Hanji and Erwin's gaze.

Hanji's enthusiasm dropped, replaced by her professional demeanor.

"Yes. When you called, you said you've been having a hard time adjusting."

"We're here to help you in whatever way we can. Please tell us what you need," Erwin entreated.

Eren rubbed a hand down his face.

"I don't know. I just... Everyone seems to have their lives together, and I feel like I'm going through the motions, watching the semester pass, but I'm not going anywhere. My friends are all working towards something, and I'm just working hard to not fail a class I could care less about."

Eren knew he made the right choice in calling Hanji and Erwin when they didn't give him pitying looks.

Hanji steepled their fingers and rested their chin on them.

"I'm sure you've heard this before, but it's only your freshman year. And I realize telling you that you have time to figure it out isn't comforting, because it didn't comfort me when I was in school either. But that's the truth."

Eren stuffed a bite of pancake into his mouth as he thought about what Hanji said. He knew Hanji was right, but he couldn't just sign up for random classes and hope something caught his interest.

Erwin cleared his throat, attracting Eren's attention.

"Did you know that students who enter college undeclared are less likely to change their major?"

Eren stared at Erwin with a neutral expression, unmoved by the statistic.

"It may seem like those students who declare a major know what they want to do, but they often don't. They take classes for their major, and then during their junior year they realize they want to major in something else. They end up staying for an extra semester or year to get the credits they need to graduate, while the students who entered undeclared and tried many classes while trying to figure out what they wanted to major in often graduate in four years."

"But what if I take forever to figure out what I want to major in? I'll have wasted just as much time as the people who change their minds half way."

College was expensive and, so far, very stressful. Eren did not want to spend any more time than he needed to getting a degree.

"Don't think too hard about what you want to do when you graduate. If you study something you're interested in, you'll find careers you are interested in that require the skills you've gained."

That... was actually reassuring. Eren was starting to feel better until Hanji said,

"Have you talked to Levi about any of this?"

Eren stuffed another bite of pancake into his mouth and replied around his mouthful.

"Don't worry, I'll wait until you're finished eating," Hanji said with a smirk.

Eren kept chewing his food but knew he'd have to swallow soon. They had just started their meal, leaving Eren with no logical escape from this conversation. Of course, he could sneak out the bathroom window or just dart for the front door now, but those weren't acceptable courses of action. Giving up, Eren swallowed.