Even lovers drown (Jerrie)

Part three

Perrie:

By our 4th interview my face hurt from the large, fake, smile that I had plastered on it. If I had to answer one more question about why I was single I was going to scream. I pulled absentmindedly at a loose thread in my top as I looked around at the room full of people. Other than the four of us, no-one here could tell if our smiles were fake or real, I doubted that Sam even knew the difference- or cared. I scoffed at that, of course she didn't care, as long as we kept up appearances. I felt a squeeze of my hand and looked up to see everyone looking at me expectantly.

"Uh sorry, I spaced out there for a minute, what did you say"

Jade giggled and winked "Head in the clouds as usual Pez".

I tried to control the blush that I could feel rising, "Oh ya, haha, that's me".

The interviewer smiled kindly at me and continued on, asking about our favorite tracks off the album as well as the writing process. Jade perked up at this and began to talk animately, I tried not to stare at her, honestly I did. I just couldn't help myself, she was smiling a big, real smile, and her eyes shone with such passion. This is when she's most beautiful, I thought to myself. That thought alone made me blush a darker shade of red, I cleared my throat as if that would somehow bring my mind back into focus.

"You alright?" Jesy whispered as she leaned over towards me "You're really red, you look like a bloody tomato"

"I'm fine" I waved her off dismissively.

"Not having another sex dream I hope" She whispered, before leaning back in her chair.

I turned around ready to tell her where she could shove her sex dream comment when I heard the interview thank us for coming in.

I sighed out. One more lousy interview left. Then I can crawl into my bed and wallow in the disaster that has become my life.

Last interview:

We arrived at the studio and after a quick session in hair and make-up made our way to the couch that had been set up for the interview. The couch would just about fit us, great I thought to myself, knowing my luck I'll be crushed up against Jade. As if she could read my thoughts I heard her angelic voice.

"Come on Perrie, sit by me, I've barely seen you all day" I glanced at her Bambi eyes. There was no point even pretending that I wouldn't do anything she wanted me to, so I slide into the small space beside her.

"Hi guys and welcome to another session of 'On the couch live' today were joined by the biggest girl band in the world Little Mix"

That always made me smile- the biggest girl band in the world. I turned my attention back to the interviewer.

"So ladies, you've just dropped a new album and become two time Brit award winners, I don't mean to jump straight into the serious stuff, but I have to ask, is there ever a time when you wonder if it's worth it?"

Now that caught me off guard, a quick glance down the couch told me the girls weren't expecting it either, a tense energy seemed to surround us. Unsure of what to say I looked at Jade, who looked surprisingly sad.

"Well" she started, a small sigh escaping her lips "I'm not going to lie and say that there isn't times you wonder, you miss out on so many things like family occasions and birthdays. Your life isn't really your own anymore, you have a sort of obligation to your fans and to your music"

"Which were thankful for" I cut in, giving Jade a smile " Our fans mean everything to us, I mean there is no us without them. But there is a lot of sacrifices you make in order to be an artist, you sacrifice relationships....". I trail off unsure of what else I should say as I feel a warm tanned hand slip into mine. Thankfully Jesy pipes up.

"The girls are right, there are sacrifices and there is obligation and ya we didn't understand how much we would have to give up when we won xfactor, but we're not those little girls anymore. Now we work hard and we see results from that, you don't win a brit without giving some things up"

"Did we mention we've won a Brit" Leigh-Anne adds with a cheeky smile.

"We've won two actually" Jesy shouts out in a Australian accent and we all descend into fits of laughter. The tension that surrounded us melting away. Thank god for Jesy and Leigh. Jade gives my hand a comforting squeeze, I expect her to let go but she continues to hold it.

The rest of the interview passes by easily enough. Finally we leave the studio and head towards the bus. I make myself comfortable, pull out my phone and start to scroll through instagram. What I see makes a hard knot form in my stomach, a picture of me exiting the hotel this morning looking worse for wear with the headline "Perrie Edwards admits in interview that she had to sacrifice relationship with Zayn for career" .

Seriously.