Kaz: Have you all escaped yet?
Nina: yep, shall we proceed?
Kaz: Yes. You should all be familiar with the new plan by now, just don't get captured again.
Jesper: aww kaz doesn't want his friends to get captured ha ha
Kaz: You long-legged, immature bastard. You podge. I am far stronger than you, intellectually and physically. I don't need you here. I don't care if you get captured, I just don't want the rest of you hob knockers whining the whole way back about how I left you behind. "Whhhaaa! You left Jesper! Whhhaaa! I miss him!" You honestly think I consider you a friend? Hah! No. You are the Queen Lady's plague to my Ketterdam. The Fjerda to my Ravka. You disrespect me, mock me, you kicked me out of my own group chat! You have made my life far more difficult than it was before. You got that? Good. Now let's go find Yul-Bayur.
Jesper: oH
Wylan: Found him!
Kaz: Where?
Kaz: WHERE?
Wylan: nvm it was just a leaf
Inej: its ok wy, we all make mistakes :)
Wylan: :)
tImE sKiP
Nina: ive made it to the menagerie, but I cant find my star-nosed mole costume
Inej: its in the back, next to my narwhal costume
Nina: ok i found the vest
Matthias: Mmmmm vest
Nina: :0
tImE sKiP
Matthias: Where are you Bayur...
Jesper: stop sharing your inner-monologue
Matthias: *looks down, ashamed*
Inej: ew no
Nina: dont be one of those guys who uses * to indicate an action, just no
Inej: no, matthias
Matthias: *wonders why he shouldn't just end it all*
Nina: wait nooooooo
Inej: we were just joking matty
Jesper: yeah we love your inner-monologue
Matthias: *smiles, satisfied*
tImE sKip
Jesper: yall smell somthn
Wylan: I do, I think it's coming from the center of the White Island
Nina: weird
Matthias: no
Matthias: no no no no no no no no no no no no no
Wylan: Where's he going?
Kaz: I may have left a detail out of our plan.
Inej: well go on
Kaz: The Sacred Ash is our escape route, we're blowing it up.
Matthias: nonononononononononoononono
Nina: he's accelerating
Kaz: You'll never make it in time, Helvar.
Jesper: he's still running
Inej: saints would someone stop him?
Matthias: nonononononononononono
Kaz: 3
Kaz: 2
Kaz: 1
Kaz: Timber.
Wylan: Woah, sweet explosion!
Matthias: NOOOOOOooooOOOOooooooOOOOOOOOoooooo
Kaz: Okay, you can stop now Matthias.
Matthias: nooooo000000oooooooooo
Matthias: why?
Matthias: WHY??
Kaz: We're going for a swim.
Matthias: You monster, I'll never go swimming with you
Kaz: Nina
Nina: sleepy sleepy
Matthias: You'll pay for this.
Kaz: Oh I am just shaking in my cheep snakeskin prison boots. Did you find Bayur?
Nina: i found something better
Kuwei: Hello guys! My name Kuwei XD!
Kaz: Who tf is this! You had ONE job! ONE!
Inej: Nina
Nina: sleepy sleepy
tImE sKiP
Kaz: Okay, we found the scientist. Now give us the money.
Van Eck: no i lied hahahahahaha!
Matthias: *gasps*
Van Eck: and your girlfriend is gone!
Kaz: Inej nooooooooo
Kaz: By the way she's not my girlfriend it's not like that.
Nina: this isn't turning out very well
Van Eck: and you're addicted to drugs!
Nina: awww come on!
Nina: ..... does anyone have parem???
Kuwei: uh ohhhh
I hope it was worth the wait!
YOU ARE READING
Six of Crows Texting
Fanfiction"Wholesome" the New York Times "This is just what I wanted my book's fandom to turn into" Leigh Bardugo "The best fanfiction I have ever read" you if you read this
