Chasing Daylight

Felix, January 4, 2015

  He walks in here like he owns the world and even worse, Skailar’s life. Please. I’m speaking for both of them. They both leave her and walk back in as if she can brush it off that easily.

  As if she needs any of that. As if they could outrun her through free will and happiness.

  But I know she’s happy about one thing; the father of her daughter is back in their lives and clearly doesn’t want to leave. And maybe she doesn’t want him to, giving how she kissed him. I guess I should understand. I mean, they had a freaking baby only six years ago. And I was willing to feel sorry for this guy. Like I can do that now.

  I understand that people she cares about are slowly but surely coming back to her, but will she wane on her acknowledgement of me? I can’t bear to let that happen. Well, at least she’s curling up to me in her sleep right now.

 I’d told her that she’d be able to go to the hospital tomorrow to see Draven which she is, of course, absolutely thrilled about. All she seems to care about is Draven when she hears his name.

  But what I am worried about is what her father had talked to her about over the phone while we were in Alaska. What the hell does he mean that I can’t be with her anymore? Why? What does he know?

  Skai almost startles me when she squirms in my arms, tearing me from my thoughts. She yawns and nestles her cheek deep in the palm of my hand. Gazing down at her, I wonder how we can’t be together. I mean, besides the obvious that she insists is not an excuse. She loves me, I will, whatever the consequences, love her for as long as I shall exist and so far we have fought for this love that we are mending to be unbreakable by any enemy.

  But, soon, something will come our way that will threaten our love as we know it. And I only wish I knew exactly what it will be. Not Stefan, surely. Sure, he’s my girlfriend’s legal guardian, but when has something as low as that ever stopped us?

  And then I have to accept the fact that Skailar has a daughter. Whom she claimed to be her six year old sister. She lied to me and it hurts. It hurts that she would think that I would never be able to accept something like this from her. But I can’t take this away from her. What is left of her family is never going to be something I can ever take away from her.

  I know there is enough place in her heart for me. She has a big heart, full of integrity and faith. Hopefulness and grace. And most of all, devotion and care.

  How she has managed to make so many people happy and still fight her own demons is absolutely amazing and something I cannot help but admire.

  “How am I supposed to accept her being with something like you?” Jared has been in the room the whole time? How can I not realize that?

  I slowly meet eye contact with him, and realize that had no choice but to explain everything to him, like he would believe it if I had to use anything other than compulsion.

  “By trusting that we have gotten this far and I have never done a thing to purposefully hurt her.” I say, my voice low.

  “…you have just brought back my sister who has been brutally tortured by god knows who and you have the nerve to tell me that you have never done a thing to hurt her?” He bears through his teeth.

  “…I understand that you are resistant,” I murmur, only looking at Skailar now. “But I love her and I will do everything in my power to keep her safe from anything that threatens her.”

  “I’m sure that’s what you tell yourself.” He rolls his eyes. “But she is my sister and you have to understand that I will be protective over her. And to hear that she’s in love with…” he can’t finish his sentence and just simply looks away from us, shaking his head.

  “What happened in Alaska is a mistake I will greatly suffer for…for the rest of my existence, I can assure you that. But I refuse to leave her unless she orders me away.” I stand my ground, but with conditions, of course. I know very well that things will not be what they used to be now. With Jared knowing, Dylan coming back, finding out that Skailar’s sister is really her daughter, her reuniting what her father who had left her fourteen years ago.  But no way in hell am I going to abandon the girl I love all because it makes someone else seem a bit miserable.

  If Skailar ever comes to her senses, I won’t argue with her, realizing how dangerous my world really is for her.

  “Yeah, I’m trying to realize that.” He mumbles. “My sister could have died, you know.”

  “I know.”

  “I know you make her happy.” Good. “So I’ll let you be with her, but I you ever…EVER bring her back to me in any less than perfect condition than I left her in, you better make sure you start packing for hell.” He tells me, and I simply nod. Trust me, I know I’m on my way already. This isn’t anything knew.

  “Thank you for that then.” I say and he blinks tightly a few times before leaving us alone in the room again. Skai hasn’t eaten in three days, and hasn’t said anything about being hungry. Well, of course she wouldn’t.  Why would she try to draw any kind of attention to herself? Skailar simply would not be Skai if she had any kind of care for herself at all.

  I guess I’ll have to prepare a suicide mission to convince her to eat something in the morning.