Chasing Daylight

Draven, January 5, 2015

  Ok, yeah, my stomach hurts just a little. But you can’t blame me; I just had a dagger speared into my stomach by my own brother. He tries to kill me, and then helps me? How? Why? I understand how Cassidy has completely brain-washed him but, come on, if Dylan is strong enough to fall away from her after six years, he would have been strong enough not to fall for her in very first place.

  And maybe I am paraphrasing a little but come on; Skai isn’t the only person in his life now. I am still his brother, he still has his daughter.

  I was notified of visitors last night for today and that has got got be Skai. Who else would it be? Not my brother. I’m in here because of my brother. Definitely not those other two brothers who seem to hate me. A lot.

  Anyways, hopefully my ‘niece’ will be here, too. I am so excited to see Skai, I even skipped breakfast this morning that the nurses tried so hard to get me to eat.

  Actually, I don’t have that big an objection of trying to be killed. Death and life is the same to me; both are equally depressing. Well, death is a bit more peaceful. I mean, at least no one can disturb my sleep when I’m dead. Life? Life’s a reason to tell yourself oh, shit, we’re gonna die. It’s a bitch and a half and, while living life, the thing I look forward to the most is the day all the pain ends. That is just the thing.

  Any suicidal person doesn’t want to die. Nobody does. They just want to take the pain away.

  I guess that’s the only way to put it. Yep, there aren’t really any other words I can muster up to explain how this feels to me.

  My entire life I have lived in complete hiding from any kind of feeling at all. If I start to feel, all I feel is pain. And pain is what I am trying to get rid of. But how can I get rid of something I have been destined to be a part of for the rest of my life?

  “Just let it sink in,” I always tell myself if I’m trying to understand why hell has such a grudge against me. Well, then again, who doesn’t?

  “Draven!” Skai’s voice takes me by surprise, as do her arms flinging tightly around my neck. I manage to catch her in my arms, though I know it must hurt her ti move like that considering what she’d went through. I hold her close with a smile, but groan.

  “Careful, Freckles.” I say softly and she immediately leans back, ignoring her own pain. She grimaces and mouths, sorry to me but I brush it off.

  I gaze at her. She has a cut from her bottom lip, her left eye has a deep purple ring under it and her hands are thickly wrapped in white bandages. Yeah, it must hurt having your bones completely shattered in the part of your body that you use the most. I can see the outline of thick bandages wrapping around her right shoulder. Yeah, broken collarbone for sure.

  “…how’re you doing?” she whispers, grimacing again at me. I look down at my own body.

  “I think I’ve had worse.” I shrug, but then bite my lip as it stretches my stomach slightly.

  “I know you have,” she sighs, placing her broken hand over mine.

  “…you look like shit.” I can’t help but snicker, making her look at me sarcastically.

  “Oh, well, you look just ready to jump out a moving plane, don’t you?” she mutters. “Yeah, I’m fine. Nothing I haven’t had before.”

  I raise an eyebrow negatively. “Really? Even counting those douchebags all together?”

  “…it could happen.” She says softly.

  “How are you doing? With Dylan?” His name comes out a whisper but the tear streaming down Skailar’s cheek makes up for it. I gently wipe it away, careful not to hurt her already bruised cheek.