Lycan Blood/Editing (#2 book to the Lycan series!)

Chapter 45

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                                 Lisa

I stand here at the window having another restless night of sleep. Father said he took care of Samuel but that doesn't stop the nightmares. It doesn't get rid of the memories of what happened. I can't get his face out of my head.

I let out a sigh as my thoughts go to Lucious. After father found out Lucious was the reason all of this happened, I had to beg father not to go after Lucious. Even after all of this I still love Lucious and don't want anything to happen to him.

I miss Lucious, but I can't be with him. I do still love Lucious but things are different now. I don't trust him anymore. I Don't feel safe with him anymore. I know Lucious is hurt and angry and I tried to be there for him through his hard times. I tried to be a good mate and help him get past it all, but Lucious isn't going to let what happened go.

He's willing to go to any lengths to get his revenge.

I reach up and wipe away the tears that make their way down my cheeks. I know it's only a matter of time before Lucious try something else and next time father will kill him. Father has let Lucious get away with a lot because of me, but father made it clear that Lucious has one more time to do anything and he's going to kill him, it doesn't matter if he's my mate or not.

I close my eyes taking in a calming breath, stopping myself from crying.

After almost being killed because of Lucious, I now understand that I can't help him. Lucious is broken and I don't think he can be fixed.
******

The next morning I eat breakfast in the dining hall with everyone. I look around the large dining hall as people laugh and talk as they eat. Father's land is neutral ground for wolves everywhere. Everyone gets along here. Feeling the happiness from everyone else here always put me in a better mood.

"How are you feeling?" Father ask as he does every morning. 

"I'm fine." I give him a reassuring smile as I eat.

I always feel fine throughout the day while I'm around everyone, talking and joking around. But at night when everyone is asleep and I'm alone I Don't feel so fine. At night I'm always left alone with my thoughts of Lucious or nightmares of Samuel.

I'm sure these nightmares of Samuel will stop eventually. I've taken many beaten growing up while training so Samuel beating to isn't really the problem. It's looking into his empty eyes and knowing he was going to kill me is the problem. Feeling the fear of dying and thinking I'll never see my family again and how hurt everyone will be over me dying is what still bothers me. The fear and emotional pain Samuel made me feel isn't something I can simply forget.

I've killed before, but after feeling the fear and other emotions of dying I made a promise to the goddess that I'll never kill again. I never want to make someone feel that way again.

After having breakfast I walk to the school wing of the castle where I've been helping out with classes. I walk into the classroom and start to get everything ready for the lesson today.

"Hey, kiddo." I look over and give uncle Fred a smile as he walks into the classroom.

"Hey," I say as I get the test papers together.

"This teacher image seems to fit you quite well." He walks over and takes a seat in the chair behind the desk.

I let out a low chuckle. "You think so?" I ask.

"Yes, you've always been really smart." Uncle Fred tells me as the young juveniles start to enter the classroom, going to their seats as they laugh and joke around.