Matty Healy // i think we've done it all

five days

in the next five days i spent my time floating to the beach, the local pool and george and jake.

on day one george messaged me and arranged to meet, they were going home next week and he wanted to see me. it was warm so i dressed in a camouflage skirt and white tank top.
"he misses you, you know that?" he told me, i couldn't meet his eyes i just smiled and laughed
"that boy doesn't care about anyone but himself" it felt cruel to say out loud and george seemed hurt by my comment, i had to temper george wasn't only my best friend but also mattys
"nothing gonna change with us right?" he asked me clearly worried
"we will always be george and maya, the idiots who did too many drugs at sixteen" i laughed assuring him nothing would change

on day two i went to the beach, is laid in the sun for hours. my earphones stayed put in my ears all day as mellow music drifted into my mind

on day three i met with jake, outside of work he was different. his hair was less raggedy but still so beautiful. he took me out to dinner, he laughed at every joke i told and nothing was difficult with him.
"what would you like to do now?" he asked once the sun began to set
"i'm not too sure" i flushed at him
"i know!" he grinned at me as he took my hand and led me to the top of a building. my face clouded with confusion until we reached the top. we sat for what felt like hours while the sun set, the sky streaked with golden hues.
he brought a polaroid with him and he took various pictures throughout our night.
not once did i feel uncomfortable or scared, it was the opposite of me and matty. it was easy. it was nice.

day four me and jake went to the local swimming pool, he tried to show off doing silly dives.
"jake!" i screeched as he jumped in splashing me. he took both my hands and helped my float round the pool until closing.
his warm hands beneath my back and i closed my eyes and drifted.
after he took me back to his flat where we ate pasta for dinner and drank good white wine, he smiled the whole time, asking about what i was excited for back home
"honestly? my bestfriends, i've missed them so much! they couldn't afford to come out here so i haven't seen them in months!" i gushed, i felt my cheeks flaming red but i didn't care, i was excited to see them
"i'll have to come out one day, london sounds beautiful!" he smiled kindly, i hoped he meant it
"the good thing is the boys are going back to manchester so i have no chance of bumping into them. i mean i'll miss george but i need a fresh start" i suddenly realised what i was saying and my hands flew to my mouth
"i'm sorry i shouldn't-" ,he cut me off softly
"it's okay maya, really i love hearing you talk and it's not been that long, let yourself grieve for matty. you lost a big part of your life"
i did my best to smile, he was right. i just didn't want matty to infiltrate this new relationship i was building.

when day five finally rolled around jake took me to the airport, i had cases upon cases stacked and the bits and pieces stayed in LA. matty could do what he wanted with them i didn't care anymore.
"i'm gonna miss you" jake said pulling me into a warm hug
"its weird, you were just jake now you're jake" i giggled
".. thanks?" he chuckled.
he hovered above me clearly unsure about what to do next, i knew, this could be the last time i saw him for a while. i pulled him into me our lips colliding slowly and romantically. he pulled away and smiled
"wow"
"wow" i repeated as my flight was called to check in
"stay in touch?" i worried
"of course maya" he assured me
"see you soon"
"see you soon" he repeated, letting go of my hand as i walked towards my new life. fresh start