The Wielder and the Source

Chapter 34

Kon, 1,000 years ago...

Kitaya sat on the garden perch and watched the dawning sun light the eastern plains. Chaga lay stretched out behind her, getting much deserved rest after flying so hard. Gone was her heavy armour, the jewel-laden braids. She locked the whole ensemble away in a case at the back of her garderobe. She wasn't Zalika the fearsome warrior queen anymore. Now she was just Kitaya, third charge of the royal house, black sheep, disgrace, failure.

The chanting had long faded. The crowds gone back to their normal routines. And silence reigned in the nation of Kon. No doubt the whole castle was having a laugh at her expense, Ravinians included.

She'd wanted to prove to everyone she wasn't simply a brat who threw a fit when things didn't go her way. That she was capable of investing herself in something meaningful. But of course, like everything she put her hand to, it backfired in the worst way possible.

Kitaya frowned as footfalls sounded behind her. She wasn't ready to talk to anyone yet. She purposefully locked herself in her room since the incident, so she wouldn't have to face her family. Perhaps coming out here this early was a mistake.

"May I join you?" Kemah's voice came from behind her.

She didn't answer. They hadn't spoken since their falling out in the infirmary. That felt like lifetimes ago even though only a few weeks had passed. He'd seemed content to give her space, and she was more than happy to keep her distance.

His footfalls continued up the perch, and he settled down beside her, eyes on the brightening horizon. "Everyone is raving about your flying yesterday. You were in fine form." He reached behind him to scratch Chaga's head. "You too, Chaga."

Kitaya shrugged a shoulder. It's not as though any of it mattered, or would matter in the long run.

"You did a good thing, bringing all those people together. I was worried for a moment that you were stepping onto a darker path. I didn't enjoy seeing that side of you – the side that reveled in discord. But you proved yourself and upheld the nobility of our house, and for that, you should be proud. I'm sorry thing didn't go your way, but you should know by now that Eriani is just as stubborn as you are."

Kitaya almost laughed. "This isn't only about things not going my way. I feel as though I'm the only person around here who believes in me." She'd known it all along, but finally saying it out loud, finally admitting it to herself, stung.

"You know that's not true."

"Then why does it feel that way? Why does it feel like I'm wandering a dark, empty path all on my own? Every time I think I've found my way, it just turns out to be a lie. Everything is a lie. There's no point in wandering anymore, and I've accepted the fact that I may remain lost forever."

Kemah tried to place a hand on her shoulder, but she shrunk away, not missing the flicker of hurt that passed through his eyes. "Listen Kitaya, I'm proud of you. I'm proud of what you accomplished yesterday."

More patronizing words. She'd had her fill of those. All they did was bitter her tongue and sour her stomach. "Is that all you wanted to talk about? I'm tired."

He stayed silent for a moment before saying: "No, Eriani wants to see you. She should still be up in our quarters."

Kitaya nodded and pushed to her feet before mounting the perch's steps. She was halfway down when Kemah called out to her, stopping her in her tracks.

"Aderro took responsibility for everything that happened with the rioters. But that doesn't mean the rest of them won't be punished. Not only did they attempt to assassinate Raylen, but they attacked you as well."