Love Can Be Confusing

Happy And Normal

"Which car do I take?"
"Just pick one girl, and thank you for being my little spoon last night."
"No problem." I walk around and pick the Ferrari 812 she smiles,
"You like fast huh?" I shrug,
"I'll see you later big spoon."
"Promise?"
"Of course." Cristina hugs me before I take off, let's test this baby out! Empty road for the next 5 miles straight shot, I punch the gas faster and faster. I slow down at 208MP my heart feels the adrenaline. Mmm I like it a lot, I pull into the parking lot and get stares. Crap, I should have just took a less flashy car. I look at my outfit, sexy and tight..... look in the mirror, no visible bruises thanks to Cristian's makeup. I sigh, I look to good, ugh!!!!!!
Your so stupid! You should have grunged down, fuck!
I get out ignoring the whispers and lock the car which makes it honk which makes the people that weren't watching before do it now. I bite my lip and keep walking even when I hear my name and cat calling. I wonder who stayed to take care of Danny,
"Holy shit, you look hot!" Quinn says walking up to me, I smile and twirl around.
"Thank you, sir."
"Wow, you look amazing."
Danny says walking up to me, I thought he was going to binge drink again.
"You didn't go on a drunken binder?"
"I remember you saying you'd always be there for me and you wouldn't leave me so I believed it. Like a dumbass because you did leave me but, I deserved it."
"Yeah you did and you'll keep on deserving it because I don't want to talk to you right now. I'm still very upset with you."
"Then I guess I'll just leave then."
Danny walks away,
"Tight black Jean's, black leather heal boots, black corset covered with a black blazer. Who knew you could do fashion with so much black." Quinn says making me smile,
"This is the way I've always wanted to dress but, I never had the money."
"Damn! Look at that ass!"
Some guy says walking by,
"Hey don't fucking talk that way about a girl you fuck head!"
Quinn says making the guy walk away quickly, I smirk and walk with him to my first class which has Jax.
"So Jax...."
Quinn says awkwardly,
"What about Jax?"
I ask confused,
"I'm team Jax so is Cin and Eric and I'm pretty sure Cristina is too."
"Well I'm team me for right now, I just need to get away from them. kind of hard when I have Jax for class right now then Ty."
"I'm an office aid I can get you out for those classes just send me a text on what periods it is."
"Well right now and 3rd."
"Okay I'll come get you in 10."
I smile and walk in, Jax looks at me up and down as I walk down the row, he puts his head down. He doesn't want to talk to me? Did I do something wrong? I'm supposed to be the one mad and annoyed.
"Jax?"
He ignores me for a second,
"What?"
"Are you mad at me or something?"
"Oh no why would I be mad? I gave you a home to sleep in gave you strong advice about the other guys about how they were dogs and you still tried with them and left me like trash. I bet now that you know how they are you wanna try with me but, I think I'm done being played with."
Jax gets up,
"Have a nice life."
Jax walks out ignoring the teacher calling after him, tears prick my eyes, did I just lose the truly genuine guy that liked me? Ugh!
"I have a request for Ahmina please."
I look up seeing Quinn, he sees my tears and the teach nods. I get up and run out quickly and slam my body against the locker crying my eyes out.
"Hey, what's wrong?"
"Jax, he is done with me, he said he is done.... I lost the one guy that actually liked me for me...."
"Don't say that, he is just upset, go see him, he probably went home."
"No, I screwed everything up... I have something to do, i was going to wait for tomorrow but I'm just going to get it over with..."
"What do you need to do?"
I look at Quinn,
"I have to cremate my dad."
"You aren't going alone, I'll go with you."
I nod, Quinn helps me up as we walk out of the school I see Danny and Ty talking by my car.
"Guys leave her alone."
Quin says,
"Why are you crying?"
"Its nothing okay, I have to go."
I open the car door and get in, Quinn gets in with me and I speed off quickly.
We enter the mortuary and I break down when the mortician brings me to the crematorium room. He unzips the body bag for me to make sure it's my dad, I nod and hug his cold stiffly dead body.
"I love you daddy."
The button is pushed the doors open and fire blazes in my eyes, the heat is so scorching. His body slides in and the doors close, the mortician says a prayer as his body turns to ash.
"The process is almost over, you can wait in front and I'll give you, your dads remains."
Quin takes me in front where we wait, Quinn never leaves my side, he doesn't speak, he just let's me cry.
"The process is $200."
I nod and give him the bank card Danny's mom gave me, he takes is and runs it through.
We leave with my dad ashes,
"Where too now?"
"To the pier I'd go to, too escape him."
We arrive at the pier, I stare at the water as it seems calm for once, as if god knew what I was doing. I release his ashes into the sea and feel better knowing my dad is free. He is with my mom and they are happy again..... I put on his favorite song Bitter Sweet Symphony by The Verve and smile as I feel a sudden lift off my shoulders.
"He is at peace now, I can feel it."
Quinn smiles down at me and side hugs me as the water stars to crash letting me know that my dad is liberated.
"Come on warrior, let's get you something to eat then take you to your new home."
We drive to a pizza shop and stuff our faces laughing about stupid stuff that has happened since we became friends and I don't feel as sad about Jax anymore but I still cant stop thinking about him either.
I sigh deeply and stop laughing.
"What's wrong?"
I shake my head,
"Jax.... I really screwed up. I though Danny was 100% genuine but, of course I always fuck up."
"Danny does like you a lot that wasn't an act but his judgment was in the wrong place completely."
"I just don't understand why guys always have to think with their ego and damn dicks." I say making us both laugh, Quinn grabs my hand.
"You are going to be just fine, you are tough okay?"
He always makes me smile,
"So after you drop me off at school where are you going to go?"
"Either to my new home to the pier or to Jax house."
"I vote Jax but hey it's all up to you."
I roll my eyes,
"Let's go back to school dork."
We take off and I drop him off,
"Thanks for coming with me Quinn."
"Anytime."
He walks away and I drive towards Jax house, I know I'm stubborn and don't know when to stop but I need to know he's not completely done with me. Or of he is....
I knock on the door and wait a few seconds then use the door bell, he opens the door.
"What are you doing here?"
"I-i came to-"
"Baby who's at the door?"
My heart drops as hands sneak around his stomach and I see his so called ex.
"You never really did it did you?"
He pushes the girls hands off,
"Yes I did. But I told you I was done remember?"
"You really mean that?"
"Who the fuck is this little girl Jax?!"
He turns to her,
"Get the fuck upstairs please, Jesus Christ!"
She rolls her eyes and slap him upside his head and walks away.
Tears slide down my cheeks as he looks down at me,
"Don't do that Ahmina please. Don't make me feel like the bad guy."
I wipe my tears away,
"No, no your right. I'm pretty much known for being a fuck up, I was stupid to think I could do what I did to you and still have you. You deserve better."
I start to walk away and keep walking hearing him calling my name, I get in the car and peel out. I just need Cristina right now or I'm going to have a panic attack. I bust I to the house and Cristina runs down stairs and pulls me into her arms after she sees me distressed.
"Omg what happened hun?!"
"Jax, I lost him... he told me he was done with me and walked out of c-class then I left to go see him and he had his Ex girlfriend there. He told me he was done being played with, I lost him. I was so stupid!"
Cristina grabs my face,
"You are not stupid! You are beautiful and smart, and strong..."
I look in her eyes with tears falling down, my face still in her hands,
Red light special by TLC plays in the distance.
"Would it be horrible if I kissed you right now?"
She asks, my heart racing and I feel my body light up at the thought, my hands slide behind her neck. Our breathing is heavy and fast, we both smirk, our lips connect. A burst of flames flows through my body, she whimpers out as I pull her body closer to mine. I pull away slowly, she smiles up at me all shy,
"Oh god... I did it again... I fucked up! Eric, how could I do this to Eric?!"
Cristina grabs my face smiling,
"Don't worry about Eric, he knows I like girls. He let's me do this."
"What? Really?" She smiles and nods pulling my face to her as she kisses me deeply I get lost and light headed. This feels intoxicating, her hands sneaking up my shirt feeling my skin, I pull away slowly and rest my forehead on hers, we both laugh.
"If the guys saw us right now...."
"They would be jizzing all over themselves." Cristina says making us both bust out laughing,
"So like do I have to sleep in the other room."
"Hmm only when Eric is here."
We giggle she kisses me again and the door opens, Eric walks in and smiles.
"I knew yall would get along great."
We all laugh and I go to hug Eric, he hugs me back.
"Just don't go falling in love with my girl."
"To late." I say jokingly and run up stairs not feeling so sad anymore, that felt so unworldly gratifying. I bite my lip at the thought of how how we looked, ugh that was so fucking hot!
"What's up with the girl gangster music?"
Eric walks in my room with Cristina,
"Its TLC it's not gangster it's just old school. It's like R&B
Shoop by salt N peppa comes on and Cristina looks at me,
"Please tell me you know how to do the dance?"
"Do i?!"
We jump up and start doing the dance, Eric watching us smiling, we do the floor part. Cristina looking straight into Eric's eyes, we jump up and stop.
"Baby are you getting turned on?"
"I've never seen you dance like that."
He says,
"Well maybe because I used to be the only girl in the group. And the girls the boys would bring around would be uptight whores."
"Dammmm!" Eric says making us all bust out laughing, we hear honking outside and the I feel my phone vibrate.
Cristina looks out if the window,
"Jax..." I say looking at my phone, she nods at me smiling.
"Go get your man, don't forget to tell him you might be bisexual."
"Oh my god." I say running out and downstairs, I open the doors.
"What are you doing here?"
I say standing on the porch, he smiles shaking his head.
"You know why I'm here, I came to see my girl."
"Me?"
"Yeah, you dummy!"
"Well I have something to confess.
"Oh god what is it now?"
"I think I'm bisexual."
"Oh, well I can work with that."
I smile,
"Get your ass over here!" He yells at me crouching over, I run to him fast and jump into him. He catches me as I wrap my legs around his waist, my butt meets the hood of his car. Our lips lock for a long deep kiss that makes me crave more. He pulls away,
"I'm sorry I was so harsh."
"I deserved it. Where is your ex?"
"The fuck if I know, I told her to get the hell out."
I shake my head smiling.
"Your the only girl I want."
"I'm yours."
"I'll try my best to make you happy."
"I know you will."
"So what makes you think your bisexual?"
"Ummm I kissed, we kissed, Cristina and i."
"Oh! Oh.... that's hot."
I smack his chest and he laughs,
"Are you going to continue to stay here?"
"Would you be mad if I said yes?"
"No, I want you to be comfortable."
"Take me inside lover boy."
"Yes ma'am." He says in a country accent, Jax grabs my hand and we walk inside.
"So?" Cristina asks
"We are together and I told him about us, and he is cool with it I think."
"Only if I can see yall kiss right now."
Jax says, Eric smiles,
"Yeah, what Jax says."
"Yall are such guys."
I say rolling my eyes, Cristina grabs my face and kisses me deeply, her tongue slides inside my mouth igniting a fire. My hands in her hair savoring the feeling, she pulls away slowly, her eyes looking into mine.
"That was so hot." Eric says making all of us laugh, Cristina and I hi five each other.
"So how do you think Ty and Danny are gonna take this?" Cristina asks,
"Well we will probably have to babysit Danny for a bit but Ty moves on quick so there's a good thing." Eric says, Jax come up behind me and hold me,
"I got my girl, I really don't care."
"Well I care about Danny, even though he is and ass hat." I say, Jax turns me around,
"We will take care of him."
I nod,
"Eric we should go check on Danny, he is so emotional right not its annoying."
Jax kiss me gently,
"If he is okay, would it be okay if I came back here and stayed the night?"
"You have to ask Cristina, this is her house."
"Oh yeah, that's fine."
Cristina grabs my hand and yells out,
"We are going to be upstairs making out."
"Wait really?" I ask as she drags me up the stairs, the guys shake their heads and leave.
Cristina pulls me in her room clashing our lips together, we giggle as we fall back on the bed. She stops and looks down at me,
"Let's make a pact right now."
"Okay. What is it."
"Let's stay friends and if we aren't married by the time we are 23 we get married."
"That's insane...... so insane I love it."
"Really?"
I bite my lip and kiss her gently,
"Yes." Cristina lays on the side of me and snuggles her face in my neck.
"Mmm this feels so good."
She says in my ear,
"Definitely."
Faded by Zhu plays on a loop Cristina hands me a pill,
"What is this?"
"We are going to roll baby. Take it."
I take a deep breath and take the pill with some Sky Vodka, I watch as she takes 2 of the pills.
"The drugs are quick."
I nod a feel them kick in within 10 minutes and the same song is playing but it sounds more intense and I can feel every part of the song.
"Mmmm come here beautiful."
I say pulling Cristina to her feet making her dance with me, her arms wrap around my waist.
"Kiss me."
I bite my lip and does as she says and sparks fly on the inside of my eye lids, I feel everything so differently. This feels so damn intoxicating! I don't want to stop, I back her up on to the bed, my hands undoing the buttons to her shirt. Her lace bra glows white, my lips on her vanilla scented chest makes my mouth water. I can hear her whimpering under me as i use my knee to rub on her core. My teeth nibbling her neck here and there, i slide her bra strap down kissing her shoulders giving her goose bumps.

Writing on the wall by Bob moses comes on, we look at each other and sit up quickly.
We find Jax and Eric starring at us, Cristina fixes herself up and we stand waiting to get scolded.
"Took yall long enough to get that we were here."
"H-how long have yall be there?" I ask nervously,
"3 minutes." Eric says chucking.
"Are yall mad?"
Cristina asks nervously, thank god I'm not the only nervous one. Jax and Eric look at each other,
"Nah. The way we see it is, yall wont get pregnant and if yall fall in love we can still keep it like this. Yall can have each other and us."
"That doesn't seem weird to yall?"
"We really don't care about normality."
Jax says smiling, he walks up to me,
"I just want you haaaa... are yall rolling?!"
I nod, Jax holds out his hand,
"I want some."
"Jax what about football?"
Jax clenches his eyes,
"Fuck, never mind."
"We have early practice tomorrow, we should get some sleep Jax."
"Yes captain."
Jax says sarcastically, Eric and Cristina leave my new room, Jax and I alone for the first time in 9 days . It's been a crazy 9 days, laying in Jax's arms feeling weightless and still high as hell. My eyes feel heavy, but I feel content with my final decision, hopefully all the drama will end I can just have a normal happy high school relationship now.
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Cristina😋😍