far too young to die // ryden //

- the other girl -

The first time I talked to Ryan since the split was on Halloween. I didn't recognize him at first but then I realized it was him. Sarah left me alone so I could talk to him but he didn't seem like he wanted to talk to me. He looked sad for some reason. I knew he hated me, it was obvious.
I still loved him, how could I not? I wanted to tell him that night but I couldn't because Sarah wanted to go home early.
"So, Bren, how was it?"
"Ryan seemed like he didn't want me there, like he didn't want to talk to me. He hates me, I can tell."
"He doesn't hate you, he was just surprised to see you there, ya know?"
"He despises me, he really does." I walked over to the counter and grabbed a whiskey bottle. I poured myself some and chugged it.
"Jesus, Brendon. Be careful."
"I'm safe, Sarah. Can't I just have some fun tonight?"
"Still, be careful. I'm going to bed, I love you."
"Love you too."
As she walked up the stairs, I found myself drinking more and more until my vision became blurry.
I took my phone and scrolled all the way down to R and pressed Ryan's contact.

Brendon: I'm sorry about tonight. I shouldn't have come over to you. I should have just left you alone. I know you hate me; that's why you and Jon left. You're happier without me. Have a good life. Bye, Ryan.

I placed my phone in my pocket and went to sit on the couch. I let a few tears roll down my face but before more could, I felt my phone buzz.

Ryan: Brendon, I don't hate you, never have, never will. I'm happy you came over to me. I need to tell you something but I can't do it over text. Can we hang out tomorrow?

Brendon: Sure, don't kill me haha

Ryan: I won't kill you, I promise.

Brendon: I'm sleepy, goodnight Ry

Ryan: Goodnight Bren.

I turned my phone, smiling and started walking up to Sarah and I's room. As I got into bed, Sarah turned around and asked me if I was okay.
"Yeah, I'm hanging out with Ryan tomorrow."
"That's good, isn't it?"
"Yeah."
"Goodnight."
"Goodnight."