The Blurred Line

3 years on

It's been a long time since I spoke to you and I can only apologise from the bottom of my heart – I'm not sure where that is but I'm sure it can't be that deep considering there wasn't much there to begin with! I am of course only joking... I think. In reality, life just got in the way. I have kept thinking I need to write again but it's been so long I'm afraid I'm not as interesting as I used to be or really that I can write as well as I used to when I was heavily medicated but my mum always says you never know until you try although she also says something about there being many ways to skin a cat.... I don't really ever fancy even trying to skin a cat one way to be honest. Anyway here goes!

A lot has happened really since the last time I blogged. I am now an actual tax-paying person. I don't know if that qualifies me to be an adult but I do now have to get up at ungodly hours in the morning, eat packed lunches and wear a uniform, all of which I haven't really done since I was at school. I work as a radiographic aide in the Christie hospital which I really do enjoy. The team are fantastic and, for a hospital specialising in cancer diagnosis and treatment, the Christie has a really friendly, positive aura about it. I was pretty apprehensive at first that my leg wouldn't be able to take being stood on for 13 hours a day and at lot of the time it does grumble but, for the most part, it's coping quite well. I probably should speak up more when it does hurt but I'm too stubborn and proud to tell anyone.

Radiology is an often very overlooked part of medicine. It's not at the forefront of anyone's mind when you think about research and new treatments but, without CT, MRI and ultrasound scans, there couldn't be accurate treatment or progression in medicine to combat diseases such as cancer. At the Christie, we need a 4D CT scanner to be able to take a video of what is going on in the body rather than just a photograph and we also need a completely new department this in which will be a huge undertaking. Ultimately, the department and the scanner will save lives – that's the long and short of it. Therefore, this September I will be trekking 46km over 3 countries in the Alps in order to raise funds for the new CT scanner. I'm quite apprehensive; I don't know how my leg will cope and I know that it causes my hips and knees to ache horrendously. I'm worried I'll be slow or that I won't be able to continue on each day but I met some of the people joining me last weekend and they were absolutely lovely which has given me a bit of confidence. If you've enjoyed this blog post, I have a JustGiving page I would be eternally grateful if you could donate to if you can:

The only thing is that there are no widows in radiology. There literally could be an apocalypse and we really would be the last to know. I am constantly in a state of perplexity when it comes to patients. Whether it be the excessive details of their ailments they divulge to me uninvited or if they just start stripping in front of me before I have a chance to run away (because I really don't want to see your bits) Patients never fail to surprise me. Saying "I'm not shy" doesn't really help me – I just really don't want to be scarred by seeing your bits unnecessarily thank you very much. I do generally really like the patients at the Christie – it's never boring at the very least! Generally, the patients really are very pleasant and the best bit is I always get constant updates on what the weather is doing!

Did you know the government actually considers me to be able to walk unaided? Maybe the bottom part of my leg has an invisibility cloak around it because otherwise I would be walking at a very huge limp if I was walking unaided. Like an extreme case of walking with one high heel on one foot and none on the other.

High heels! How I miss the excruciating pain of my ankles being placed in an unnatural position by a ridiculously thin strip of whatever the heck high heel heels are made out of! Unfortunately, society has dictated someone (not necessarily just a lady, come on this is 2019!) in a beautiful, flowing, fitted, dress and adorned with the most sparkly costume jewellery Debenhams has to offer can only feel sexy if there are wearing a pair of torture instruments. Oh but I used to have such fabulous torture instruments! Flat shoes just don't have the same attraction! I did try putting on some high heels but it really didn't work; my ankle just can't compensate so I fall all over the show. I did also put on one high heel when I rescued a friend at her birthday party from one of her feet blisters – the other foot had to slum it! See I really am a hero! We did a similar thing when we were walking over ice in Scotland. We had these fabulous things called microspikes which are like metal spikes that attach to your boots with elastic and honestly you feel like you have gecko feet on ice – they stick so well to it! Definitely fabulous especially if we'd had two pairs between us... except we only had the one! So one foot felt like a gecko foot, the other one felt like it was trying to keep hold of a fish! It was going all over the show! Anyway, for better or worse, I chose function over fashion and hiking boots over high heels.