I Won't Let You Go

The deal part I

Kian Steve's
After what happened akala ko may magbagbabago sa pakikitungo niya sa akin. But surprisingly, he came back the next monday and smiled at me and talked to me like nothing happened.

Pero hindi parin mawala sa akin ang kaba at guilt.
He's a great pretender after all.
Baka nasaktan ko siya pero umaaktong hindi siya affected.
I don't want him to suffer what I've been enduring.

Semestral break came in a flash.
Two weeks lang ang semestral tapos may pasok kami ulit sa first week ng November.
Nakasakay ako ng taxi papunta sa bahay nina Claude.

He gave me an address and told me to go there.
Pupunta kami ng Baguio, pagkatapos doon ay tagaytay bago kami babalik sa manila.
It's exciting. Lalo na first out of town ko to nang walang guardian na kasama.

Pagbaba ko ay napa woah ako.
Ang laki ng bahay nila.
Malaki naman ang bahay ni Tita pero mas malaki to.
Nag door bell ako sa may napakataas na gate nila.
A voice came from the small speaker near the doorbell.

"Jiang's Residence, May I help you?"

"Ahmm. I'm Kian Park. A friend of Claude's."
Sagot ko naman.

May nagbukas ng gate at pinapasok ako.
Ang lawak din ng garden nila.
May tea house pa sa gilid at rose garden. At the other side naman ay malawak na pool.
Pagpasok namin sa Main door ay may matangkad na lalaking gwapo ang kumuha sa gamit ko at sinamahan ako papunta sa may sala.

"Please take a seat. We will prepare you something to eat while waiting for the young master."

Napatango naman ako.
Maya maya pa ay may pumaradang kotse sa labas.
The guy who greeted me earlier went out and greeted the new arrival.
Pagpasok nila ay tumayo ako ng bowed to show respect.

The new guy was really handsome too. I like his gray eyes. It's chilling.
"Take a sit take a sit."

Umupo ako ulit.
Umupo siya sa harap na upuan at ngumiti sa akin.
He's full blooded British I can see.
"So you were the one who called that night, yeah?"

I nodded.
He chuckled, "don't be so tense. I'm not eating people. I'm Ace Clint Jiang by the way. Ice's brother."

I took his hand and shook it, "I'm Kian Steve Park. Nice to meet you."

Nagkwentuhan lang kami hanggang sa bumaba si Claude.
"Just a minute okay, mamayang gabi nalang tayo umalis. Night trip para masaya. Let's hang out here for a while."
Sabi niya habang may hawak na kung ano at bumaba sa basement.

His brother changed seats and sat beside me.
"So, how did you tame my brother?"

"I.. I didn't do anything though." Sabi ko.

His brother sighed. "I'm really happy that you made friends with him though.. I was really worried that he might stay cold and close his heart to everyone. Caldrix was his only friend I've ever met."

Caldrix, siya siguro yung kinuwento niya sa coffee shop noon.
"Claude.. Once told me that his only friend.. Was the only one who was able to see through his mask."
Sabi ko.

Kuya Ace smiled.. Again that sadness I keep on seeing on their eyes.
"We can say that's true. It's painful to admit but.. Even I couldn't figure out what he's thinking at all.
He never talked about himself at all.
Caldrix though, was able to make him smile and show signs of irritation.
Ice seem not to be having many problems but.. Caldrix told me one day through skype..
'big bro.. I think.. Ice needs help.'"

He continued, "I didn't know what he's talking about. Ice seems to be doing good for me. But he said, 'he's a pretender after all. He's always down. He's been focusing on things and can't even enjoy himself. Like he was doing things to satisfy someone so bad.'
Reality striked me. Our parents.. Considered him as someone who was an accident. You see, they don't love each other but had Ice because of the influence of alcohol. They forced him to become someone he wasn't. Forced him to do things he wasn't capable of.
And so I forced Ice to open up to me one day.
He said.. I felt like I was living someone else's life. You are too bright that I couldn't do anything but to stay behind your shadows. I never wished for anything but to feel like I belong to this family.. But Life's too cruel to grant that single wish. I bet being alive is already everything for an unwanted child like me."

He stopped talking after that. I looked at him and he sighed.
He tried to smile, "I never wanted to make him feel insecure and incompetent just because he was being compared to me. I wanted to be the brother he would want to rely on and ask for support. But all I did was to make him feel like his so tiny, I even made him drew himself away from me."

I never knew. I thought what I was suppressing all this 4 Years are so painful already. But Claude. That guy has been keeping all of this heavy burdens on his own from the moment he got his common sense and ability to think. I thought I'm a good actor but damn.. Claude's a prodigy and veteran in acting. I never had the slightest idea.

We stopped the conversation when Claude returned.
Nag jamming lang kaming tatlo at kung ano ano ang ginawa.
Nang sumapit ang alas singko ng hapon ay inayos nanamin sa kotse ang bags namin.

"Be careful there okay? I don't want to hear any negative news from you."
Paalala ni Kuya Ace.

"We will. Be careful here as well." Sabi ni Claude.

Kuya Ace and I froze for a second. A moment later ay biglang nagliwanag ang aura ni Kuya Ace.
"Waahh! Ice!!" Sabi niya at akmang yayakapin ang kapatid pero itinulak ni Claude ang dalawang balikat ng kapatid bago pa ito makalapit.

"Stay still! Argh! I'll never say such embarrassing things to you again!" Naiinis na sabi ni Claude even though his white ears are turning pink already.

I couldn't help but smile and laugh at their silliness. They're so cute and adorable. Especially my Claude.

Wait..

Did I say 'my'?..

Ahh!! It's a mistake!