Open Heart {Under Revision}

Chapter 49- Strength

Ten Years Ago....

We had the funeral. We buried him. The whole hospital came. His whole lot of friends were present. My parents took it all in, behaved very normally. Daniella was a mess and Shawn was half in shock, half immobile

No one bothered to speak to me. The caretaker dressed me in a foolish black dress. She braided my hair and powdered my face. She told me to be polite to people and accept their condolences. Fools, they all were fools.

Selfish fools who would resume their lives like nothing happened.

She fed me toast and orange juice. She made me walk beside my parents. Their faces were grave as I walked between them. People glanced in my direction, calling me the heir of Turner Memorial.

Grandmother cried, holding as the priest recited his verse. I paid no ear to him.

My eyes were on the person lying in front of everyone, his beautiful face drawn and eyes closed. I hated that they had added make up to his face, how dare they? How could they?! I went near him and began wiping it out. I cried as I wiped it out. My father caught me as I trashed against his arms. I yelled and cried and finally my mother had to drag me out.

I was feeling nauseous. I showed it too.

My mother snapped finally and she slapped me. She ordered me to be taken away, straight. Why would she do that?! I was grieving for my lost brother. Was I not allowed to grieve?

They lowered him to the earth and I never saw that. People threw soil but not from mine hands. Everyone was there but not me, the one who was closest to him. I was a disgusting filth, incapable of being loved. I was the stain in my family who could not hold herself in front of others.

I needed to be taught a valuable lesson which was to be remembered throughout my life.

And that night, my father and uncle came to my room and taught me that lesson.

-XXXXXXXXX-

He was still smiling.

I sighed and walked to him, straight to his arms. We both sighed melancholically.

"I've missed you. Its was hard to forget your interns head snapping voice around in the hospital." I whispered against his chest. He chuckled and kicked the door close. I eased away from his body, and walked into the apartment. Today, it felt so different...in a familiar way. I neared the couch and stood, asking, "Can I sit?"

He frowned at me, "Why are you asking even?"

God...that voice...I missed it. Jesus, it was only four days...and still it felt as if he was away from me for four years. I was so madly in love with Ethan.

I fell on to the soft couch, the exhaustion and 36 hours of non-stop action begging to me close my eyes. My back was sore and I was into a 6 hour surgery, sprinted 4 clicks to my house and then another day at the hospitals. My legs hurt, my stomach a mess from the mess I had eaten, only once. Sometimes, drinking cola only had its effects. A headache was threatening and I wondered how my body hadn't given out.

This was the same Ethan and other attendings went through. I would too, just never imagined this early.

"Do you want anything?" Ethan asked from the kitchen. When he walked there, I had no idea. I waved my hand, "We need to talk, I am in big time trouble."

"When are you not? Calamity Charlotte." he replied with a humour in his voice. I also noticed the edginess in it too. I closed my eyes and muttered, "It's Calamity Jane...but Charlotte matches much better."