"What in the actual fuck?" You yelled, Roman was unconscious and some freaking nut job stood in his place.
"Well if you want to, I guess I'm down." The man responded, getting ready to take off his pants.
A chorus of no's halted his movement.
After a moment of confused/disgusted silence, you regained your voice.
"Who the hell are you?"
All of a fucking sudden he was like all up in your bidness.
"Well my dear I can whatever you want to scream later."
What. The. Actual. Fucking. Fuck.
"No thanks."
He returned to his spot seemingly upset.
You turned to the only person who could give you a straight (ha) answer.
"Logan, explain."
"This is Remus, or Duke, Thomas' creativity."
"Bullshit." You responded and motioned to Mr. Motionless on the ground. "That's Thomas' creativity."
"This is Thomas... Bad... Creativity." Patton fumbled.
"Kinky." Duke smirked as he shot a wink in your direction.
"Okay... Like the creativity that helps you plan murders in precise ways?"
Virg, Patton, and Thomas shuddered and nodded.
"I can do so much more. Like that thought Thomas had about fuc-"
"No!" You cut off, "no, no, no, no, I do not need to know whatever you were planning on saying."
You did not want nor need the image in your head.
"Also, uh Thomas, quick question." Thomas nodded in acknowledgement, looking exhausted as fuck.
"Why the fuck do all your dark sides flirt with me? First snake face, now ashy-stachey like wtf?"
Thomas sent a look of apology to you as he shrugged his shoulders.
"Well you're quite irresistible. And don't act so innocent Thomas, you've fucked her in a dream y'know." He seemed to smirk as he twiddled his mustache
"And?"
Everyone was semi put off at how unfazed you were.
"Thoughts like that happen all the time, you can't exactly control it. Not to mention you literally admitted to making him think like that."
Duke pouted, before pulling a stick of deodorant out and... Eating it..?
"What. The. Fuck." You gagged.
The entire situation was borderline freaking you out.
"Okay... So ima go... Logan, talk some sense into them. I'll be back tomorrow, cause you need to settle this then sleep."
You opened the door.
"Bye you guys," Remus lifted his hand to wave at you, "not you." He solemnly put it down.
As you were about to walk down the porch steps you heard something.
"There's a snake in my butt."
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-421-
Yeah, so that happened. Not exactly an x reader but I thought it was kinda funny soo...
Also, been trying to write more. Any ideas or anything do comment, I may not do them all but I'll try.
