𝐄𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐌𝐨𝐨𝐧 ♦ 𝐑𝐃𝐑

chαptєr 1

"𝐸𝓃𝒹? 𝒩𝑜, 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒿𝑜𝓊𝓇𝓃𝑒𝓎 𝒹𝑜𝑒𝓈𝓃'𝓉 𝑒𝓃𝒹 𝒽𝑒𝓇𝑒.
𝒟𝑒𝒶𝓉𝒽 𝒾𝓈 𝒿𝓊𝓈𝓉 𝒶𝓃𝑜𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓇 𝓅𝒶𝓉𝒽. 𝒪𝓃𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝓌𝑒 𝒶𝓁𝓁 𝓂𝓊𝓈𝓉 𝓉𝒶𝓀𝑒."

I still will always believe that in many ways, we truly are blessed and cursed. I guess in my sense, Selina and I have always been nothing but cursed. Least, that's how it feels in the given moment. Our children, we don't know when we're ever gonna see them again. Our two sons and our little girl, god, help us if anything were to happen to them. Now, I have yet another baby to worry for, an unborn one of all things. I knew it was gonna happen at some point, but the damn timing. It's so off again. Sure, we're not in a gang anymore and things have changed a hell of a lot. We've changed, but, at the ages of thirty five and thirty four, looks like we're gonna have to find it within ourselves to get that fire back within our eyes. We're within Blackwater right now, thank god the handcuffs are off. They were torturing the both of us, we're being escorted through the town as the criminals we once were. Everyone eying us like we were the bad blood of this society, yet, everyone knew who we were too. "The Sanders Family", now it just all seemed to be dark secrets that we were keeping in the silence for so many years. She looked angry, confused, distant for once. Her green hues not bothering to give me more than look here and there but I can tell she isn't happy and it's making me a bit sad to say the least. I had never seen Selina in a more depressed state than she was now. Though, I think she is angry. I can just tell.

"Alright, the lot of you, here, we will hop on the train to Armadillo. There, you will await the arrival of John Marston... You all remember him. We're gonna go get him, so you will all be accompanied by some other agents there... With him, you all will go after Bill Williamson, Javier Escuela, and then your leader--- Mr. Dutch van der Linde. Been many years since you've seen him. It's our job to keep this country safe. You two... Are just as guilty as all four of them."
"In what sense, Agent Ross? We were living our life perfectly fine!" Selina finally snaps at the male who comes up to her real close.
"Because... Ms. Hinton... You ran with them just the same as John, Arthur, any of them!"
"It's Mrs. Sanders."
"Not according to your file..." He puts his hand out to the male beside him before he hands him a file in which he was carrying.
"Selina Hinton, age is thirty five... Your mother is Rose Trinity, originally Hinton with your biological father, Antonio Hinton. When you joined Dutch's gang you were twenty two, got pregnant with your first child then, sought a better life in Strawberry where you later married Mr. Sanders. Nearly married once before but you fell in love with a criminal.. Who's given you two more children, plus another... Trust me, we saw your exchange. Doesn't change how we'll treat you either. He might've given you a good life and you might've taken his last name but you will always be known as Selina Hinton and therefore, I will address you as such." He mutters before handing the file back to the other. "Now... As I said... This is where we part. Though, if you so desire to run off without John. Do it... Not like he's much use anyway."

We both look at one another before the man gives us a nod and hops upon his horse. "So this is where you leave us huh? You just gonna make it that easy, Ross?" I question. Agent Ross chuckles before a roll of his eyes. "We'll cross paths in due time, Mr. Sanders. Believe me, we will."
"What dirt you got on me in those files huh? Be a man and tell me."
Ross sighs deeply before the file is handed back to him, I watch as he flips through the pages just as we hear the train off in the distance. "Asher Sanders, age is thirty four. You were born to Sue and Robert Sanders whom were killed at the hands of the former O'Driscolls gang. You were picked up by Dutch shortly after alongside the late Mr. Miller. You killed many people but still managed to hook Ms. Hinton here who fell pregnant with your first child... blah... blah... you aided in the downfall of Micah Bell... your wife is about to bear your fourth child in the coming months and you have two sons and a daughter. You're the original outlaw here, but unlike Marston, you're not separated from your wife, just your children. We could've been just as cruel to you both but—- Ms. Hinton here has killed more people than Ms. Roberts ever did." Well that stung a bit to hear. Knowing that I was the one who drug Selina down with me was all I would've ever thought about back in the day, because I knew it was true. I did this to her. She would've been married right now to some army man, who I, well, I killed so many years back. I just know she wouldn't be in this mess right now like I was.

"Well, here is where we do need to part ways now. I bid you two a safe journey." Agent Ross mutters, that same tone of sarcasm leaking through his words as the train is pulling up and making a complete stop. Selina and I lock eyes for the moment before we deeply sigh and board the train. We take a seat next to one another and I just know she has a lot on her mind right now. Being a mother and being in this situation must've felt a hell of a lot different than it did in 1899 when we were expecting Arthur, before we both did gain the full title of parents. It was a change if we were honest, even I wasn't thinking I'd feel any different, yet, being the father of three children and becoming an outlaw all of a sudden again was a bit urking to the mind. We didn't talk for a good portion, all these people sitting around us and all. We just didn't want anyone to grow uncomfortable or afraid of us, though we were sure by the people who did enter after us, seeing us being escorted by government agents wasn't the best thing to see when you're on your way on a train. I allow my hand to come over and gently grasp hers. She looks at me a bit confused before finally taking ahold of my hand as well. "I love you..." I mutter and though it takes her a moment, her green hues focus upon me and I can't help but smile a bit. Her eyes would always be like the deepest emeralds. "I love you too, Ash. I just wish we weren't in this situation. Hard enough being without the kids and now I get to go at this with another one in me. Always fun. Reminds me way too much of our situation before Arthur was born. This is just too fresh though, got a feeling either I'm gonna have this baby on this journey, lose this baby, or we're gonna make it out just in time. I just really couldn't tell you at this point." I look her up and down for the moment as her gaze diverts from me. I could tell she was really torn up with all of it. I was sure she was too, being pregnant, those hormones but having to keep herself in check as well. Everything in between, it wasn't easy at all for her to say the least. "We'll get this done and over with, Sel. I'm sure we well." She almost looks me over as if she doesn't believe me. I'm sure she doesn't either. This was a lot. "Don't know if this is something I can believe, cowboy. You and I have had a good run as outlaws back in the day, but now, I just feel like this isn't who we are anymore." I hated hearing her say 'outlaws', I always did hate it when she'd refer to herself as someone like me. I knew what I was before I met her and in the end, this was what happened. We raised a nice family, nice place to live, everything in between. So who was I to ask anything of her other than for her to act as if it never happened. I wanted that for Selina, I wanted her to pretend that we lived this perfect life all along and everything that has happened, everything that is going to happen now is nothing but a nightmare that we'll wake up from soon. "Right." That's all I can muster up to say, wasn't worth the argument I suppose. We lean back now, silent again, she rests her head on my shoulder. This trip to Armadillo was a long one. Not sure how I felt about seeing John again, it had been a few years now since mine and Selina's real wedding, last time I ever did see him and Abigail and Jack. Who I was guessing now was about fifteen, or sixteen. Crazy to think that time has passed like that, still remember when that boy was a little guy, running around camp. Now he was in his teens. Even my own son was going to be thirteen next year and that just made me feel old.

I suppose in the long, things would work out as they did. Who really did know? We never did apparently.