John knows with the life of him that it's not safe being with Freddie- that they should part their separate ways. Opposites attract, they attract so much that it hurts. Metaphorically, and literally.
Like the times Freddie demands John onto his knees and doesn't tell him to stop until he knows John physically can't go on sucking him off much longer. And John does it. He'll do anything to please Freddie.
Freddie gets a bit power hungry unintentionally at times, reveling in it. John knows he doesn't mean bad and is too timid to stop him from touching him in bed two hours before they have to get up in the morning, off to uni for John and work for Freddie. It's not healthy in the slightest bit, and John can't tell his professor that he's a bit off in the morning because his boyfriend was making him come three consecutive times in a row, relentless until John's penis was so sore and he was in tears, burying his face into Freddie's chest and begging him to stop.
But when Freddie tells John to shut up and take it, John does. He has no fight, never really has, and just wants to please Freddie, even if Freddie's not getting off from it.
John's just thankful that for the most part Freddie has boundaries, like he's not going to make John parade around in a diaper and wee in it. He might have him in the tightest boxers found in the young teen boys department and tell him he can't wear anything else until he's absolutely ruined them, but John doesn't mind. It helps distract him from important exams coming up when he's coming in his drawers and showing Freddie the dark spots that've seeped through the same pair of boxers that outline his bum so firmly and the bulge in his front.
John thinks Freddie has boundaries - strict, defined boundaries - until he proposes a threesome. It's more of demand when he's a hand around John's cock, going slower than normal upon waiting for his response. John can't say no - not like this, not ever, and agrees with a breathy whimper and a buck of his hips, only to be pinned down to Freddie's mattress and told to sit still.
John can't say no, even though he's confused as to why Freddie's so okay with someone else fucking his boyfriend. The only plausible solution is that Freddie wants to fuck someone else, but that doesn't make much sense when he explains that the guy, Roger, went to uni with him and has been dying to meet John since hearing all about him. Naturally, John blushes and agrees further, feeling a bit better that Roger and Freddie were never a thing and it's just Freddie's way of showing off his boyfriend.
And John loves the word boyfriend, so much that he calls Freddie it sometimes just because it feels right on his tongue. Not only that, but he has an older, hot boyfriend, who treats him well and is great in bed and sweet, and it's all he could ask for, really. Their personalities blend so well that John refuses to believe otherwise and let anything ruin their chemistry, like his own hesitance towards a threesome because he's only eighteen and has never done that before.
When Roger comes over on Friday, John doing coursework on the couch and blushes when Roger's eyes trail over his sitting form and holds out his hand for John to take. John's hand is dainty in comparison to Roger's, who has a million rings on his fingers, similar to Freddie.
Freddie's making dinner in the kitchen and Roger goes in there to talk to him briefly, before he's in the arm chair in the living room and watching John write notes on his reading due Monday. John has a pen between his teeth and tries to pay attention to Thoreau and his long rants about nature. He needs to pay attention for his upcoming test and - Roger's watching him, is the problem. John too nervous to scribble anything down that's coherent, his hand near shaking. Too scared to look up and talk to Roger and too scared to go into the other room, purposely ignoring him, Roger does the first, smiling with his hands capping his pen.
