Untitled Absurdity

Saturday, July 6th, 2019

I met the Emperor Tsundere and his harem, and I surprisingly feel strangely quiet and peaceful, something like an ethereal feeling. 

He wore an Iris blue shirt, that made me him look so masculine, I must admit it. 

The thing was today I did my retaliation mission against him. I worked together with the Moon Lady by asking her to answer my call, but her picture and name in my contact, I changed with Hiro's picture and name so when I called her, instead of her, people notice Hiro's picture. 

And the result was awesome. Somehow I had this entitlement feeling, I knew it was wrong to do something like that, I became petty. Still it feels nice for awhile to look at their funny expression that full of curiosity. Emperor Tsundere didn't show that much of reaction though, he somehow just looked more emotionless, does it even make sense? Well, if he truely didn't have anything about me inside, he wouldn't care much and just act like nothing happened, right? I chose to accept the face value condition rather than going around with my assumptions here and there. 

Even my mom felt worry that I would have hope again that maybe Emperor Tsundere will like me, but I said, hell no, indeed I still have remaining feelings about him, but to expect that he could reciprocate my feeling, I don't think it is possible to happen. 

I feel win but I feel lose at the same time. Winning because I feel that I am back with my power and lose because it feels like I took revenge and retaliation instead of forgiving, what is the point of all my worships? I didn't feel that good when I imagine what would happen to him if he would taste my suffering before, will he be strong enough? Oh well, I am not his friend, he never thinks about it so why should I bother, right? 

That's all for my entry for today, the ethereal feeling gives me a peaceful night to be enjoyed without any grievances and heartache, a surprisingly peaceful and hearty weekend.